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Somehow, my phone ended up sending Facebook-status updates to the wrong page. Nonetheless, this does eventually give me the opportunity to bring up the conversation as to how pets such as my sister's puppy, Camille, can affect the mental health of their human family members—such as my sister and me—for good and—albe inadvertently—for bad.
Like my sister, I have OCD/Anxiety; and let's just say that, that exacerbated our dread when Camille ended up at the emergency vet due to a fever and pre-UTI inflammation or a UTI infection. For many (if not most) people with OCD/Anxiety, this is the case: that is, dreads that are understandable and normal become exacerbated, and the exacerbation affects an OCD/Anxiety. Thus, an OCD/Anxiety-Exacerbated Dread cycle began when Camille ended up at the emergency vet.
There have also been other mental illness-exacerbation cycles regarding events ad other matters that involve Camille and Reilly (my puppy), and I imagine that this is nothing surprising to other pet owners whom also have mental illnesses. I imagine that this is also nothing surprising to those whom've read what I've specifically written about or otherwise mention in regard to those matters—not to mention that I feel absolutely judged (and know that I've been judged) for writing about those matters (Don't think that I'm not aware of that when, e.g., I lose friends on Facebook and followers on Twitter for writing about those matters and sharing my writing—what you think of me online reflects exactly what you think of me offline, as the Internet is merely technology that you use and not the reason for how you act offline and online).
Am I going to lie, though, when, for example:
Like my sister, I have OCD/Anxiety; and let's just say that, that exacerbated our dread when Camille ended up at the emergency vet due to a fever and pre-UTI inflammation or a UTI infection. For many (if not most) people with OCD/Anxiety, this is the case: that is, dreads that are understandable and normal become exacerbated, and the exacerbation affects an OCD/Anxiety. Thus, an OCD/Anxiety-Exacerbated Dread cycle began when Camille ended up at the emergency vet.
There have also been other mental illness-exacerbation cycles regarding events ad other matters that involve Camille and Reilly (my puppy), and I imagine that this is nothing surprising to other pet owners whom also have mental illnesses. I imagine that this is also nothing surprising to those whom've read what I've specifically written about or otherwise mention in regard to those matters—not to mention that I feel absolutely judged (and know that I've been judged) for writing about those matters (Don't think that I'm not aware of that when, e.g., I lose friends on Facebook and followers on Twitter for writing about those matters and sharing my writing—what you think of me online reflects exactly what you think of me offline, as the Internet is merely technology that you use and not the reason for how you act offline and online).
Am I going to lie, though, when, for example:
- I overslept quite a bit during Reilly's first year due to a Depression flareup? I was very lucky that Reilly needed up to 20 hours of sleep per day during that amount of time, meanwhile.
- I have been unfairly judged by my mother and even my sister, whom have said that I shouldn't own a pet if I can't take care of her or him due to how my mental illnesses affect me? (By the way, "[Y]ou shouldn't own a pet if you can't take care of her or him" is a common canardic trope that is used against people with mental illnesses and other people with disabilities—not to mention people like me whom have both mental illnesses and other disabilities.). They (like others) could be a little more understanding and helpful instead of unempathetically judgemental.
- The mental illnesses that I have effect energy drains that affect me to not be the best "Momma" to Reilly and "Auntie" to Camille?
- The guilt that I feel for not being the best "Momma" to Reilly and "Auntie" to Camille affects my Bruxism to flare up (as it's affecting it to flare up as I type)? By the way, I inherited every single one of my mental illnesses (including OCD/Anxiety) from my father, whom also has Bruxism.
- There are actually matters about which I've not written (including which I didn't mention before writing this blog entry), such as OCD/Anxiety flareups when I'm making cards with pictures of Reilly and Camille? Because of the OCD/Anxiety flareups, making those cards can take quite a bit of time. For example (and this is where I feel judged already again), I often hit the "Undo" or "Delete" button when making those cards because what if, for example and God forbid. I'm using colors that look like colors that hate groups use (I try to avoid using certain colors because of that.) or drawing a shofar with shapes and end up using it on the card, anyway, because I can't correct the part of it that looks like a butt when at least one of the shapes is unfilled or outlined? Am I actually being irreverent and is my motive actually to be irreverent, even by typing this? Also, I avoided using "objects such a shofar with shapes" because I don't want to sound like my Anti-Semitic ex pastor whom called the Ark Of the Covenant a "piece of furniture" by calling a shofar an object.
Incidentally, my memory-affecting ADD also flared up as I was writing. For instance, I forgot for quite a few seconds what I was intending to Google when I (and for a moment just now, I forgot that I wanted to type "intending to Google when I") went to Google "Bruxism"? As for when my ADD flares up in regards to immediate matters regarding Reilly, instances of my ADD flaring up are when I forget that I was going to put on her harness and leash or give her a treat.
Meanwhile, Camille is healing from the pre-UTI inflammation or early UTI infection—and (though I don't mean to sound flippant) excuse me if part of her pre-UTI inflammation or early UTI infection was due to not taking her to "go potty" as often as it seems like I could, as my energy is frequently drained. Besides, Camille doesn't always immediately ring the bell when she needs to "go potty", and I don't know if she needs to "go potty" until she rings that bell or indicates that she needs to get out of her crate during naptime to ring the bell.
