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Showing posts with label slander. Show all posts
Showing posts with label slander. Show all posts

Wednesday, October 26, 2016

Though I Forgive And Don't Begrudge, I Don't Forget

I'd be absolutely foolish to let my guard down and pretend that someone didn't wrong me when he or she did wrong me, especially when he or she comes back to slander and/or libel me about what he or she said and/or did. In fact, as I've come to know because of how I was abused during my childhood, one's placement of blame on his or her victim of slander and/or libel is abuse on top of abusethat kind of abuse is known as verbal abuse and/or emotional/mental abuse:

  • Verbal Abuse occurs when one person uses words and body language to inappropriately criticize another person. Verbal abuse often involves 'putdowns' and name-calling intended to make the victim feel they are not worthy of love or respect, and that they do not have ability or talent. If the victim speaks up against these statements, they are often told that the criticisms were "just a joke", and that it is their own problem that they do not find the joke funny. They may also be told that no abuse is happening; that it is "all in their head". Verbal abuse is dangerous because it is often not easily recognized as abuse, and therefore it can go on for extended periods, causing severe damage to victim's self-esteem and self-worth. Damaged victims may fail to take advantage of opportunities that would enrich their lives because they come to believe they are not worthy of those opportunities.
  • Psychological Abuse (also known as mental abuse or emotional abuse) occurs when one person controls information available to another person so as to manipulate that person's sense of reality; what is acceptable and what is not acceptable. For example, [a form of the most-extreme kinds of] psychological abuse [occurs] when a pedophile tells a child victim that [he or] she caused the pedophile to abuse [him or] her because [he or] she is a 'slut' who 'tempted' the pedophile. Psychological abuse often contains strong emotionally manipulative content designed to force the victim to comply with the abuser's wishes. It may be emotional abuse in this sense when it is designed to cause emotional pain to victims or to “mess with their heads” in attempts to gain compliance and counter any resistance. Alternatively, psychological abuse may occur when one victim is forced to watch another be abused in some fashion (verbally, emotionally, physically or sexually). Like verbal abuse, psychological abuse is often not recognized as abuse early on and can result in serious sequela (psychological after effects) later on.


You'd be foolish to think that I won't call you out on it or take other actions of admonishment regarding you, and I have even reported threats of violence on Twitter to both Twitter and the authorities. Imagine, then, what actions of admonishment I'd take offline if I'm willing to report threats that are seemingly small because they are online—for example, I'd threaten to sue you if I had to do so, whether I'd get a pro-bono lawyer or ask the court to make you pay legal costs and any necessary damage payments. By the way, ask a few people whom I had to threaten with legal action for their clear violation of the ADA—once I threatened the action and reaffirmed my threat, they suddenly decided to make the accommodation which they needed to make.

In conclusion, I remind you that "forgive and forget" means "forgive and don't begrudge"—not "forgive and pretend that it never happened".