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Showing posts with label family history. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family history. Show all posts

Wednesday, November 8, 2017

My Next Book Is Being Published. Why I Made The Prices High This Time, By The Way

As I stated in the most-recent excerpt of the book, "[a]fter all, just typing all of this after a partly-mental-illness-affected hiatus from writing has affected my mental illnesses to flare up." For me, having Cerebral Palsy and mental illnesses (not to mention IBS) makes writing incredibly hard especially when I'm often drained of energy. Exacerbating the difficulty that I have in writing books is that I type with only one finger at a time, I can't format pictures and adjust screenshots as quickly as those without Cerebral Palsy or similar conditions can (at least physically—for those of them that have mental illnesses and/or other conditions, their difficulties in typing, formatting pictures and adjusting screenshots, etc. can be just as significant as mine).

Thus, I think that the labor that I put into writing this book justifies the $9.99 Kindle-editon price and the $18 paperback-edition price for which I am selling the book. By the way, my arms and legs are feeling tired as I'm typing; and my OCD/Anxiety, etc. is flaring up along with my muscles feeling tired.

Also by the way, I'm still giving away a copy of my first bookespecially since its main subject has been incredibly patient with me throughout all of this, including a difficult time that I'm enduring for both my sake and for my first book's main subject's sake.

Update (7:03 PM EST): The new book is published.


Excerpt From My Upcoming Book: “Dark Irish”, Allen, and “Polio”—Three Bubbe Meises That Nana Allen Told To the Younger Kids (With My Maternal Grandfather Being One Of Them)

I seem to have more of a contempt for my late maternal grandfather’s mother the more that I understand about her, at least wherein her bubbe meises are concerned. The three bubbe meises that really (forgive my language) piss me off (as if “shit” wasn’t language for which I might need to ask forgiveness):

1.    That we’re of the “Dark Irish”
2.    [Not excerpted here]
3.    That my grandaunt Kas had polio

The real stories are the following, respectively:

The “Dark Irish”


We’re Portuguese Irish, and likely even Sephardic Jewish and Irish. Nana Allen’s maternal grandfather was a “John McCoy”, and probably an Anusi—and “McCoy” was certainly not his own name, as he is not buried in the McCoy Family Plot in Baltimore’s New Cathedral Cemetery. As for how he immigrated to Ireland, my grandaunt Bernadette “Bern” Allen Dew (z”l) stated that “He fled a war in Spain”—which I found out after I saw the Census record that read “Spain” and “Ireland” for the respective birthplaces of Nana Allen’s maternal grandparents, the parents of the Rosalita “Rose” (or “Rosa”) McCoy Reilly whose 1900 Census record lists the “Spain” and “Ireland” in question for her parents’ birthplaces. As for the “war in Spain”—as “John McCoy”’s 1850 Census record helped me to research—that war was the Peninsular War, from which he as a Lisboa-born infant fled with his parents to Ireland.

About three decades after he immigrated to Ireland as a war refugee—and almost certainly an Anusi one at that—he immigrated to the United States as—as far as I know—an immigrant. By 1850, he had been married to MaryAnn Elizabeth née McCoy for at least eight to ten years and had the following children:
1.    John, Jr.
2.    MaryAnn Elizabeth, Jr. (whom, per a record of her second husband’s family history, told the bubbe meise that her mother was born “Mary Dolan”)
3.    Ann

He seems to have named the first two children per minhag Sephardi—after all, the first son was named for his father, and the first daughter was named for her mother (and apparently got a flair for spreading bubbe meises from—ironically—her, as the 1880 Census Record for a “Rose Riley” lists both of Mrs. “Riley”’s parents as having been in Ireland—and even while the 1880 Census record for MaryAnn’s and Rose’s sister Lavinia lists them as having been born in Maryland.)

Then he had four more children, and a nasty divorce to boot about six years after the youngest one was born. While I don’t know the exact circumstances of the divorce, I know—as I said—that he is certainly not buried in the McCoy Family Plot in New Cathedral Cemetery, and that his wife told the Census taker that she was a widowed mother of four daughters as of 1870.

By 1880, he had a grandchild whom proved that his Sephardish Yidishkeit was still around and alive within the family, even though he apparently hadn’t been around or alive since 1870—his daughter Rosalita had a daughter whom she named “Ann(e)”, and his ex-wife and his daughter’s in-law mother both went by “Ann(e)”. Then he had more grandchildren by Rosalita with a mark to prove that no real Catholicism was to be found as far as he was concerned: after all, none of the granddaughters carried “Mary” or any variant thereof for either a first name or otherwise as an honorific for the mother of Jesus.

Even Alice Marie Reilly named none of her daughters “Mary” or any variant thereof insofar as the prénom d’honorifique de la Virginé is concerned—the first names of her daughters were “Marguerite” (since her in-law mother was Margaret Conley Allen—and I’m now realizing where her Sephardish Yiddishkeit showed up in that regard, if I hadn’t already realized it a little bit), “Katherine”, “Bernadette”, and “Dolores”.

 (Per JewishGen, by the way and although JewishGen covers mostly Ashkenazi Jewish communities, “Marguerite” and “Katherine”—and variants thereof—were used among Jews; and as one rabbi told me when I asked if naming Reilly for Nana Allen and her mother was permissible in Jewish tradition, “There are no rules for such a thing. You may name your pet anything you like.” Also, Ariela Pelaia of ThoughtCo—formerly About.Com—captures what I’ve generally read regarding both Hebrew and Non-Hebrew names when she states, “[T]here is no hard and fast rule when it comes to giving your child a Hebrew name.”

(Also by the way, Sephardic Jewish girls will sometimes be named after living grandparents as opposed to living parents—the minhag varies in that regard.) 

As far as Alice Marie’s sisters, they were (besides Anne—z”l—whom died at the age of seven or eight):
1.    Rosa
2.    Sara—not “Catherine”, but “Sara Catherine” (and contrary to what Mom claims, “Sara” is not a common Catholic name—or at least too common of one—as it would arouse suspicions, especially in a family in which the first girl is not named “Mary”)
3.    Helen
4.    Agnes—whom later became “Sister Mary Rosalita Reilly”

By the way, Alice Marie’s first son was Edgar Joseph, for his father and distinguished as “Edgar Joseph Eymard”—and I’m now really beginning to see the Sepharidish Yiddishkeit (or “Sefardishkeit” or even “Ladinokeit”— and I’m going to assume that I coined those despite I can’t say that I made those up—after all, “Sefardish” and “Ladino” were long around before I was, and making  “Sefardishkeit” from “Sefardish” and “Yiddishkeit” is simply just making a compound word that can be used to describe the Yiddishkeit of Sephardim in Yiddish.

(Also by the way, I’m pretty sure that this is at least part of why my maternal grandfather took an interest in Yiddish, although he was—even if he didn’t know that he was—reasonably ascertainably a matrilineally-Jewish grandson of a patrilineally-Jewish bat Anusim—and his widow, my maternal grandmother, is my maternal grandparent whom is of Ashkenazi Jewish heritage.)

Meanwhile, this alone (as I’m now realizing) helps to explain why I thoroughly and even defensively  explain quite a bit of what I explain—as if getting called “an overall liar” at Sheppard Pratt by a caseworker whom fell for my father’s lies about me wasn’t enough, having Nana Allen throw her younger children and their descendants for a loop really affected me to start laying out every detail of quite a few cases once I found out about being thrown for such a loop—and as if many of my matriarchs and patriarchs on Dad’s side didn’t do enough loop throwing, todah rabah (and their loop throwing was more understandable than her loop throwing, as—as I later read—the Inquisition ended in 1834, whereas increasing Anti Semitism still affects many of my paternal relatives loathe to admit that we’re Jewish—even to the point at which one relative is trying to paint me as an overall liar in regard to what my father’s maternal grandmother did, and notwithstanding that I can neither help what happened or conjure up evidence to fit the narrative of what he wants to believe what happened.

(Incidentally, that will—God willing—probably end up in More Shit And Other Stuff That I Can’t Make Up—after all, just typing all of this after a partly-mental-illness-affected hiatus from writing has affected my mental illnesses to flare up.)




“Polio”


This one probably pisses me off the most. Despite articles that discuss the Irish Catholic “shame” of the Kennedys regarding Rosemary Kennedy (with “shame” being the word that the Kennedys themselves used), Nana Allen—who herself identified as a strong Irish Catholic—still has no excuse for lying about Grandaunt Kas’ Cerebral Palsy.

The story still goes that Grandaunt Kas contracted polio when she was seven or eight—this despite that she wasn’t going to have time to contract polio in the midst of the Spanish Flu Epidemic of 1918 and the Rheumatic Heart Fever Epidemic of 1923-1925 or thereabouts. Rheumatic Heart Fever is what actually killed Grandaunt Dolores, whom died on January 25, 1923, by the way (and as for where I got the 1925 date, Great-Granddad Czarnecki’s sister Regina died of Chorea due to Rheumatic Heart Fever on June 23, 1925).

Grandaunt Kas was born on November 6, 1911, and Grandaunt Bern somehow remembered that Grandaunt Dolores died in the Spanish Flu Epidemic. Either way, no way was Grandaunt Kas going to be going anywhere where she could contract polio—she was probably as housebound when the Spanish Flu hit the Allen household as much as all of the Allen children were when Rheumatic Heart Fever hit the Allen household. The more that I thought about that, then, the more that I had to conclude that Nana Allen told another bubbe meise—even my grandmother at first said that she didn’t know for sure, and that Nana Allen had “a lot of stories”.

Besides:

1.    Mild Cerebral Palsy can become worse after illnesses such as the flu and Rheumatic Heart Fever—and with illnesses that can cause fevers, you’re messing with illnesses that can cause some serious brain damage. So either way, Grandaunt Kas either had exacerbated Cerebral Palsy after the Spanish Flu Epidemic or she had a fever that effected brain damage and resulting Cerebral Palsy.
2.    The person whom told me that Grandaunt Kas had Cerebral Palsy, he would have no reason to lie—he worked for her when he and my mother were in high school, and she could tell a kid like him what she wouldn’t have dared to tell peers of hers or quite a few people within her own family!



That would also explain the real reason that Grandaunt Kas turned down three marriage proposals—not because she wanted to be single and independent, but because she was afraid that each of her suitors would run if they found out what she really had—and I can tell you that because I’ve lived being both implicitly and explicitly rejected by peers of mine due to my Cerebral Palsy.

Tuesday, October 31, 2017

Excerpt From My Upcoming Book: What Knowing Would've Helped: e.g., My Father Passed His Mental Illnesses Down To Me

April 2006, Spring Break, a threat of suicide, and thus a whole week in April of 2006 and a whole Spring Break spent in Sheppard Pratt...and this after I reached my breaking point with my father's abusiveness. Not to mention that learning about the Holocaust 4.5 years earlier, right after 9/11, actually partly effected the onset of my OCD/Anxiety, Depression, and ADD—and that I would eventually figure out that that's why he had all of those pill bottles in his apartment, and that other matters would be explained by my father's OCD/Anxiety, Depression, and ADD.

So went my life with the fallout of 9/11, the times shortly before it, and the times shortly after it. At least my father's admitted to having ADD since then, but the Depression and OCD/Anxiety are still—albe an open secret to me and others—a secret. Of course, knowing about my father's Depression and OCD/Anxiety would've helped before I had to end up in Sheppard Pratt, let alone after I ended up in it. The worst part is that my mother knew about it and didn't tell me even about the day that she ended up discovering that he took Wellbutrin®, the generic of which I currently take (at least when I have the energy and time to be at consistent with my medication as possible) and any given form of which I have no idea in regards to whether my father still takes it.

Speaking of medication, my father's paternal grandfather—whom took medication for his own Depression—did not have medication work for him, and he subsequently took his own life as a result of ultimately-medication-resistant Depression. That, too, would've helped to know, especially when the bubbe meise about him dying of Black Lung was pulled together from three facts that were quite the opposite of the facts of his too-late-to-abort suicide attempt:


  1. An Anthony Czarnecki was born in October 1908 and died in 1972—and my father claimed that his grandfather died when he was 12. That Anthony Czarnecki died in a fire in Philadelphia, in contrast to the Anthony Czarnecki whom was actually born in October 1904 and jumped off of Exeter's long-since torn-down Falls River Bridge in December 1964.
  2. He did have Black Lung as a result of being a miner and did actually immigrate from Poland. However, he as a pogrom survivor came over here with his parents, and his brothers Bernard "Bernie" (whom was subsequently exploited by my great-granduncles John and Joe), Joseph "Susi" (whom my granduncle Tony, z"l, understandably described as an "SOB"), and Edward "Ed" Czarnecki (whom subsequently served at Fort Knox when my grandfather served down there in the days of mandatory service) served in World War Two. In other words, the bubbe meise about a lone immigrant from Poland whom became a miner, served in Korea, and died of Black Lung obscured a darker story and helped my try to father steal valor from Great-Granduncles Bernie (whom died in 1963) and Ed (whom served stateside during Vietnam and prior to the draft, and probably Korea). Thus, not ever occurring to me was that a child survivor of the pogroms and an Anusi felt the ultimately-fatal weight of his being an Anusi and other matters in his life (including his brother Bernie's death from a Schizophrenia-caused coronary occlusion after years of suffering either a botched shrapnel-removal operation or a lobotomy, and his brother Susi's exploitation of a fellow veteran—and one whose botched shrapnel-removal operation or a lobotomy left him a child-like and easily-exploitable state for the rest of his 43 years.)
  3. If Anthony Czarnecki wasn't the grandfather whom apparently died when my father was 12, then it would've been his grandfather Michael Gaydos. After all, a Michael Gaydos whom was born in 1891 did die in 1972. Of course, it wasn't the 1904-born Anthony Czarnecki whom died in 1972, and it wasn't actually Michael Gaydos, either—Great-Granddad Gaydos died of a heart attack when my father was 15.
Only a copy of Great-Granddad Czarnecki's death certificate that a maternal cousin of my father sent me cleared up that matter for me—and my father's excuses that I was too young to know before did not help my father, either, as he just added insult (his excuse) to injury (his bubbe meise). My mother's excuse that it was up to him and not her to tell me also didn't help, as she once again went along with my father's secrecy.

By the way, Depression also killed my paternal grandmother's granduncles Frank, Sr. Fosko and Andrȧs "Alexander" Foczko, as well as—despite the denials of some of my family in spite of the statistical evidence—her grandfather Istvȧn Foczko—whom died young and had seven children, with six of them being sons, and with 2/7 of his children and of his sons taking their own lives.

As for five of her maternal aunts and uncles, they had Alzheimer's and other forms of Dementia—and Alzheimer's and Dementia are linked to Depression.

Do the math, and you will figure out why knowing that I inherited Depression (as well as comorbid OCD/Anxiety and ADD that only exacerbate the Depression) from my father would've helped long before I was in Sheppard Pratt and long after I was in Sheppard Pratt, and long after I maybe wouldn't have been in Sheppard Pratt had I known about that the mental illnesses that I have and set on as a result of my father's abuse, the fallout of 9/11, and other factors came from that same father whom abused me partly by hiding that he has those mental illnesses. 

Monday, October 23, 2017

Why The Eagles May Be The New Football Team For Whom I Root


  1. Embarrassing the U.S. internationally (i.e., in the United Kingdom) was wrong (and that goes for the Jaguars, too). 
  2. I have paternal roots in Pennsylvania (and regardless of whom likes it or hates it, Jewish roots where my ancestors felt safer as Anusim in the U.S. than as Anusim or open Jews in Europe. As a Jew, then, I have to ask fellow Jews and others to remember that we'd all have to kneel if every persecuted group had to kneel—even WASPs aren't exactly as White as they'd like to think. Besides, one of the great Phillies players was Jewish—his father and one of my great-great-grandmothers were maternal siblings through Anna Haszlinsky Uszinskyova nee Jasova.). 
  3. On the note in Point Two: if any group should be kneeling, Jews should be. However, regardless of our various beliefs—as a Jew is a Jew regardless of whether he or she is religiously traditionally Jewish, Buddhist, or something else—many (if not most) of us have been able to recognize that the "Judeo-Christian" country that the U.S. is often actually not has been—at least up to this point—one of the Diaspora safehavens for Jews and allies of Jews compared to multiple countries throughout history.
  4. This is (as I recall) another loss in a row for the Ravens since the Ravens-Jaguars game (Divine Justice against the Ravens for being ingrates?).
  5. I might root again for the Ravens when I see the Ravens players kneeling for the Baltimore Police and not Freddie Gray or other criminals, such as the toadie of a certain late priest—since they're kneeling for one criminal, they're kneeling for other criminals.

Wednesday, October 4, 2017

To Rep. Tim Murphy: My Mother's Cousin Was Gang Raped And Kept Her Baby, And...

You didn't even want to keep your consensually-conceived child! Your ex mistress is absolutely right about your hypocrisy:

"In response to an anti-abortion message on the congressman's Facebook account, The Post-Gazette said the woman wrote: 'And you have zero issue posting your pro-life stance all over the place when you had no issue asking me to abort our unborn child just last week when we thought that was one of the options.'"

I suppose that your RINO friend, the so-called "POTUS", is rubbing off on you. By the way, how's your life working out, besides that it seems to suck right now?

In comparison (as my mother last heard), my mother's cousin's life ended up working out. When she couldn't adopt out the child, she kept the child and ended up with a man whom's long since been an adoptive father to a child whom could've easily been aborted or abandoned.

Incidentally, your pro-life stance and other moral stances are actually fake news—and remind your friend of that the next time that you see him, so that he'll have an actual example of fake news which he can't try to spin: after all, the direct source will have told him that his pro-life and other moral stances were fake news.

Monday, October 2, 2017

A Historical Comparison By A Bat Anusim, And "Can Congress Actually Impeach A 'President'?"

No, and the continuing problem is that people are calling D*****d Tr**p "President". As a fourth-generation pogrom survivor, I can tell you that talk—e.g., about Congress removing Tr**p from officewithout action is—as the saying goes—empty words, or even words that are full of either irony, paradoxy, smooth-tongued malice, survivalism, or mystery and/or secrecy. My paternal family's words in regard to our heritage, for example, were and are full of mostly survivalism and secrecy, due to the ironic and maliciously-smooth words of the self-proclaimed Judeo-Christian United States. 

They were full of survivalism and secrecy when my paternal grandfather's paternal family became Anusim and fled Lipsk for a United States that at best ended up doing relatively bupkis for especially other Jews in Russia (both in the Imperial Era and the Soviet Era, the former of which Great-Granddad Czarnecki and his parents fled). Along with Great-Granddad Czarnecki's family were other families (including other sides of my father's families), both of Anusim and of Non Anusim, whom fled Russia—not to mention Jewish families (including other families of my father) Austria Hungary and Imperial Germany, and not to mention Jewish families (including family members of my father) whom fled Post-Austrohungarian and Post-Kaiserreich states and localities—and for these Jews, the United States also did bupkis.

Where, for instance, was the United States during the pogroms and the Holocaust but for getting involved in wars and other matters only when they affected the United States directly? In one case—and probably one of the most infamous (if not the most infamous of the most infamous) ones—a president allowed Nazis into the United States, got involved in War World Two only Pearl Harbor was hit, and spurned a delegation of rabbis, even at the cost of Jewish-American civilians whom were somehow in Europe during the Holocaust in Germany. As for the Holocaust in Russia, especially after the Holodomor and Stalin's intent to implement his"Final Solution" plan, the United States also deliberately failed to get involved in that! (By the way, don't be fooled: Stalin darned well knew that Ukraine had long had a significant Jewish population, and the Russian Army surely wasn't quick to stop the Babi Yar Massacre!)


This time, especially those of us whom are descendants and/or otherwise relatives of direct pogrom and Holocaust survivors are as affected by an aspiring Neo ****** and Neo Stalin as our ancestors and/or relatives were affected in Imperial, Nazi, and Communist (including Soviet) Europe—direct pogrom and Holocaust survivors are being affected all over again. The most-significant factor in all of this is that anyone is calling D****d Tr**p the "President of the United States", and an illegitimately-elected "President" is not a "President". Meanwhile, are especially direct and indirect pogrom and Holocaust survivors not to be at least a little scared of a man whom, for example:

  1. Targeted especially Jews from the beginning? After all and for starters, according to him, "the only kind of people [whom he wanted] counting [his] money are little, short guys that wear yarmulkes every day," yet "[we weren't] going to support [him] because [he didn't] want [our] money".
  2. Has used Anti-Semitic and otherwise-bigoted revisionists like Julian Assange (a known bigot) and Vladimir Putin (a goes-without-saying bigot) to get him illegitimately elected and continue to be in the White House? Julian Assange even went as far as to deliberately decontextualize emails about pool parties and other subjects to make the bad-enough-as-is Hillary Clinton look worse than she is—and to decontextualize emails like that might be hilariously pathetic if it didn't affect a base whom was looking for an "anyone but Hillary" excuse. Putin, meanwhile, helped Tr**p with the hacking of voting machines and continues to help him try to obstruct the Russiagate investigation?
  3. Also targeted other groups from the beginning, and used proxies besides Assange and Putin—even ones whom volunteered to be proxies after the fact? Ask, for instance, a certain proxy from ReddIt
  4. Either does nothing when a person receives threat from Tr**pites (and I've received at least three) or even blames the victim of death threats (whether he directly makes those threats or blames someone whom received a threat from at least one Tr**pite? By the way, I'm—so to speak—small potatoes, at least for the most part. Reporters for media such as Politico, "GQ", and "The Atlantic" are not. Incidentally, regardless of whether someone's Jewish or gentile, that's akin to when the Nazis and Soviets were targeting those whom they assumed to be Jewish, isn't it?)?
Then the least that others (including and especially Jews who call D****d Tr**p "President") can do is stop calling D****d Tr**p "President", and Congress will finally remove an illegitimately-elected "President" from an office that he isn't supposed to have.

PS I stated "Communist (including Soviet) Europe" because I had forgotten that Yugoslavia under Iosip Tito was independent of Soviet Russia. Post-Austrohungarian states such as Czechoslovakia (1968-1991) and Hungary (1956-1991, after the failed resistance against the Soviets), and localities in Poland (July 5, 1945-December 25, 1991—at Augustów—or thereabouts—if July 5, 1945 did not seal Poland's fate) were not.

Tuesday, September 26, 2017

Re "For Some Moms, The Nest May Never Be Empty"

My dad's 49-year-old cousin Jamie was treated for seizures when he was 1.5 years old, and the doctors at the hospital gave him an overdose of codeine. They didn't wait to check with my granduncle and grandaunt, whom were out on a date night and having my grandaunt's sister babysit Jamie, and this was despite that Jamie is allergic to codeine.

As a result of the codeine overdose, Jamie got Cerebral Palsy and had his development stop right then and there. My granduncle and grandaunt were gracious and merciful about it, understanding that my grandaunt's sister tried her best by taking Jamie to the hospital. They also gave the doctors the benefit of the doubt, and they opted to not put him in a Pennsylvania state hospital or school (and this was three years before Willowbrook in New York was exposed).

I can only imagine the "What might've been?" and "Why did this happen?" questions that they've had, and especially since Granduncle Jim's endured a lot of other losses along with Jamie's loss of a normal life. Even before he lost the chance to see Jamie have a normal life, he lost his uncle (my great-granduncle) Bernie (of blessed memoryy) only years before (and Great-Granduncle Bernie had a botched shrapnel-removal operation that resulted in his having brain damage and resulting regression to a child-like state); and he lost his father (my great-grandfather Anthony Czarnecki, whom was a very-difficult man and -abusive father) due to Depression-affected suicide in the year after Great-Granduncle Bernie died at the Veteran's Affairs Home and Hospital in Lebanon, Pennsylvania due to a Coronary Occlusion as a result of a Schizophrenia flareup (and perhaps Granduncle Jim and even other relatives—and I myself recently—have wondered if Great-Granduncle Bernie didn't actually have a DVA-forced lobotomy that did damage similar to the damage that Jamie's codeine overdose did).

As for some of the losses after Granduncle Jim's having to deal with Jamie's loss of a normal life:

  1. His brother (my granduncle) Francis (of blessed memory) died at the age of 45 due a heart attack and Alcoholism in 1985.
  2. His brother (my granduncle) Tony died unexpectedly in 2014 at the age of 68—and being almost four years older than him, he expected to be outlived by him.
  3. His daughter, Denise, has never married or had children due to suspending much of her life to help care for her older sibling—so, he's also watched as Denise has lost a chance to live a normal life.
  4. He nearly lost his own life when he could've died due to a fall that he had from a letter in 2007, when he was trying to clean some eggs that some punks had thrown onto his roof. 
As for Grandaunt Annie, she's endured both losses of her own losses that she and Granduncle Jim have shared. Meanwhile, both Granduncle Jim and Grandaunt Annie are in their 70s, and both of them are probably wondering what they're going to do in terms of what happens with Jamie when each of them dies—and what happens, if Denise, who's now in her 40s, and/or other relatives can't and/or won't take care of Jamie after they are gone?

Thus, I think that Granduncle Jim and Grandaunt Annie—and perhaps especially Granduncle Jim—can relate to that feeling of never being able to have an empty nest and especially never being able to watch each of their children live a normal life, let alone having children and grandchildren that'll someday live their own normal lives. 

PS To Miriam Sokol, let me add to the following:

"I didn't know that, for example, my dad's 49-year-old cousin is a "difficult child". But what do I know? That overdose that he had on codeine when he was 1.5 years old must've been his fault. Never mind that the doctors at the hospital didn't wait to check with my granduncle and grandaunt before they tried to treat him due to his seizures."

What I want to add is this:

Jamie is not at all a "difficult child" (and neither is every other child or adult whom's afflicted with especially-severe physical and intellectual disabilities). In fact, Jamie is a very-sweet and -loving person (as I remember from when I and my side of my family would see other sides of the family every year that we could up to Pennsylvania to visit my great-grandmother, of blessed memory).

Monday, September 11, 2017

A Reflection Re "Heaven, 9/11 Memorial Version"






I can only imagine how, I suppose to a similar extent, my paternal grandfather's father and living siblings felt on September 11, 1922 and subsequent days. From what I understand, my great-great-granddad Julian Czarnecki was absolutely no hero—or if he was one, his bad facets outweighed his good ones. Nonetheless, his death must've really weighed on my great-granddad and his living siblings (one of whom would follow her father only slightly over 2.75 years later).

Great-Granddad was going to be 18 that October (and to compound the worst matters in his life, he turned 25 on a day on which a 25th birthday would not be joyous to anyone—Black Thursday). So on that birthday (and subsequent birthdays), he had to remember the loss of his father (with whom he had a conflicted relationship—or at least I'd be surprised if he didn't have a conflicted relationship with him—and subsequent birthdays would become even worse as the years passed and worse events kept happening—in fact, his 35th birthday had the fresh pain of Black Thursday's 10th anniversary and the only-almost-two-months old invasion of Poland).

As for Great-Granddad's youngest sibling, she wasn't yet even nine months old when Great-Great-Granddad died—and the oldest surviving one had, if you count 13 as the bat-mitzvah age, become a bat-mitzvah that year (and she was the one whom followed Great-Great-Granddad into death on June 23, 1925).

At least none of them were around to see 9/11. However, my great-granddad's widow—to whom he was quite abusive, and with whom she obviously had a conflicted relationship—was, and so were four of his five children (One died seven hours after birth, right before the 10th anniversary of his aunt Regina's death.). While I do not know whether my great-grandma ever met her father-in-law or her sister-in-law Regina, I know that she was well aware that September 11th always carried pain for my great-granddad—as carried every October 24th, and not just because of the September 11th before his 18th birthday—and both were born in Jewish homes (he in Anti-Semitic Polish Russia, she in an Anusi home in Ashley-Hanover Township, Pennsylvania) and raised in Anusi homes, and they thus knew the pain of every passing September 11th (on which Great-Great-Granddad may not have died had his family not disowned him for becoming an Anusi) and October 24th.

I can only imagine how the pain of every other September 11th hit her on 9/11, and I never did ask her because I didn't know our family story—not even that we were and are Jews—not to mention that I saw her only once every year from some time in the 90s until 2005, and I was dealing with an abusive dad (It's like the Passover question that the fourth child doesn't ask—he or she doesn't ask because he or she doesn't know how to ask or maybe even to ask at all.).

I wonder what she thought—or at least would've thought—if she heard this song—I also wonder the same about Pop-Pop (whom was sadly, as Granduncle Tony stated, "Like father, like son.") and Granduncle Tony (whom unexpectedly died on July 31 2014, three days after what would've been his mother's 101st birthday). I also certainly wonder what Great-Granddad would've thought and what Granduncle Red (Francis "Red" Czarnecki, whom died in 1985) would've thought (BTW, he was called "Red" because of his red hair—which, as I later found out, is, so to speak, a dead giveaway of if someone is Jewish in Poland, as is Brown hair for someone whom's a Brown-haired Jew, as Ethnic Poles are indigenously light-haired and light-eyed).

Thursday, September 7, 2017

Excerpt From My Upcoming Book (Language Warning): "The Summary Of the Case For Saving The Old Farmhouse..."

Firstly, how the case to save the late Katherine Ushinsky Gajdos’ house is related to shit that I can’t make up:

1.    With my grandaunt Helen Gaydos Wojnar (z”l)—my paternal grandmother’s oldest sibling—being long deceased, her widower and children had decided to tear down her (and my grandmother’s) paternal grandmother’s old farmhouse down without even considering the historical ramifications of tearing down the farmhouse.
2.    Grandaunt Helen’s (and Grandma’s) sister MaryAnn once again told a classic bubbe meise that—I’m sure that—she still hasn’t told anybody: after all, the historical significance of the farmhouse begins with the fact that Anna née Jaszová was not “Maria Anna Yzchinski” by birth. As I mentioned in a telephone conversation and further explained to my father in a text message—since, as I type (on September 6-7, 2017/Elul 15-16, 5777), he’s visited one of Grandaunt Helen’s sons three times while he’s been down in Florida—I understandably wondered if Grandaunt Helen’s widower and descendants left up the farmhouse, which I’d seen the times that we were up on the former Gaydos farmstead (where the Gaydos-Wojnar cabin is).
3.     Bugs, rotting wood, excursions of wildlife within the farmhouse, apparently-common-across-Pennsylvania houses like that, and other given excuses for tearing down the Gaydos Farmhouse are no excuses at all.
4.    Until I brought up the possibilities of renovation or replica building, nobody even considered leaving up the farmhouse.

I gave my father the short version of the historical significance of the Gaydos Farmhouse:

“Mickey Haslin was Great-Granddad Gaydos' maternal cousin. They had the common grandparent of Anna (Szuszanna?) née Jaszová (Yashová), divorced from Jan Haszlinsky and remarried to Jan Uszinsky (Ushinsky). Her parents were Jan and Eva Polinová Jasz (Yash). She was Jewish as were her parents, and as was Jan Uszinsky.
“That is why Great-Granddad identified as "Russian"—his mom, Mickey Haslin's only parental aunt, was born as Katarina Szuszanna Uszinskyová to Slovakian-Jewish parents of Russian-Jewish descent in Gaboltov, Slovakian-Austrian Hungary. Mickey Haslin seems to have done the same—his father was George Hazlinsky, and not a single one of his kids was a "Mary" (even for the traditional Jewish usage for "Miriam". His kids were named Mercedes, Kathleen, and Michael.
“They used a mix of Ashkenazi and Sephardi naming customs, by the way—quite a few Ashkenazim overall, irrespective of beliefs re Jesus or amounts of Sephardi heritage, seem to have done this. "MaryAnn", BTW, could be used for "Miriam Chanah".) That alone makes the farmhouse significant if you ask me—i.e., the Crypto-Jewish paternal aunt of Mickey Haslin and widow of a Crypto Jew (a son of Jan and Anna Hommová Gajdosz) owned that farmhouse as a widow whom posthumously became the paternal grandmother-in-law to one of the three IRS agents whom would help bring Nixon down.
“Also, BTW, Ashkenazi Crypto Jews and their descendants (Anusim Ashkenazim v'B'nei Anusim Ashkenazim) are probably as numerous as Sephardi ones—even John Kerry would be John Kohn and Madeline Albright was born Madeline Korbelová, e.g.. Cameron Kerry is whom is called a "ba'al teshuvah", meanwhile, whereas John Kerry and Joan Kerry identify as Jewish Catholics; and Madeline Albright is a Jewish Episcopalian.”


In other words, the seven following simple words sum up any tearing down of the farmhouse of Katherine Susan Ushinsky Gaydos: a big mistake of literally-historical proportions!

Monday, August 14, 2017

I Do Not Want To Read Or Hear "What The White Supremacists At Charlottesville Are Saying

To me, for news sources such as AOL News to publish articles such as "White supremacist seen in viral photo" is despicable. For people to also be circulating the photo is despicable—despite what he says, he wants to be seen and get publicity for being a racist.

Besides, as I've said, I hear enough White-Supremacist rhetoric from even some of my family members—and we're Anusim and B'nei Anusim! By the way, the cousin who I mentioned before once stated that she "figured that we had Jew blood" or something like that—and she definitely used the "Jew blood" phrasing, which is Anti-Semitic phrasing.

As for another family member, for instance, she blamed part of what happened at the rally for the counterprotestors going down there instead of just ignoring it—in contrast to, for example, her late grandfather (a proud Siedenburg-Mueller, whose ancestors were Lutheran Anusim, and a proud Lehr) whom chased her future mother with a belt when she joked to her brother, "You're just like ******"  (Incidentally, her mother may also have been Jewish, as—for instance—her paternal grandmother was a Peltz for no baptism record has ever been found for her, in contrast to the DeBoys for whom baptism records have been found.).

In conclusion, then, I don't want to give the White Supremacists a platform that many of my own family already seem to (in their cases, self hatingly) take—as I said, I hear enough White-Supremacist rhetoric from even some of my family members (By the way, most White-Supremacist rhetoric at least nowadays is more Anti Semitic—and more Anti-Semitism driven in the first place—than it is Afrophobic, Hispanophobic, Arabophobic, or otherwisely bigoted toward gentiles.).

Sunday, August 13, 2017

Excerpt From My Upcoming Book: It Began In the Toponymical City of Dunilavičy

I don’t know how I didn’t know other than that I wasn’t told that I’m Jewish—let alone the whole backstory behind why we passed for gentiles. What I do know is that I should’ve known when someone asked me if I am—that is, if I am related to Kirk Douglas. I honestly remembered that “Danilovich” was a patronymic in his case, and I told the person that “Danilovich” is a patronymic in his case and not related to “Daniłowicz” in my paternal family’s case.

Then I relooked at the Wikipedia entry—“Demsky” wasn’t his birth surname after all, as I found out. After that, I saw the family resemblance—and the “Czarnecki buttchin” turned out to be the Danilovich-dimpled chin, I figured out. Then after that, I read about how Kirk Douglas raped Natalie Wood—and I should’ve known that I’m related to Kirk Douglas even if I’d only read about that.

Leave to the Daniloviches to wreak havoc on the world—and my own side of the family had and has done plenty of that—and each other—and even many (if not most) of us that try to be good aren’t innocent of having wreaked some havoc. We also have havoc wreaked on us by others besides each other—as I say, “If you’re a Danilovich, you either are trouble, attract trouble, or [have a case of] both[instances —that is, that you both are trouble and attract trouble].” (By the way, I used to say “crazy” instead of “trouble”, but then I considered how “crazy” is ableist language.)

Meanwhile, as I’ve also said, there’s something in that Danilovich water—and it all (apparently, anyway) began in Dunilavičy, Belarus (Duniłowicze, Białorus), to where I’ve traced it back (thus, why I say “apparently”: it could be Daniłowicze in what is now Podlaskie, Poland or another Daniłowicze or Dunilavičy).

Using JewishGen and Google Maps as well as other sources (including YadVashem, since I ended up finding—for example—a record for an Esther Chernetzki from Chausy—the birth city of Herschel “Harry” Danilovich), I’ve traced my Danilovich/Daniłowicz from Dunilavičy to Podlaskie, Poland’s Lipsk nad Bierbzą as such—this is, for all intents and purposes, a very-rough tracing, by the way. Also by the way, keep factors such as the following (and I think that you can tell that I’ve researched all of this and also figured out quite a bit):
1.    There was no traveling outside of the Russian Pale and back to it without permission to be outside of the Russian Pale in the first place.
2.    Per JewishGen, Lipsk shifted from being in Borisov Uyezd in Minsk Gubernia to Augustów Uyezd in Suwałki Gubernia by 1900.
3.    The shift from being openly Jewish to being Anusim seems to have come from Abram “Wojciech” and Marianna Kruszyńska Daniłowicz when a son named Mendel died in Filipów in 1841. Their daughter who was the mother of my paternal grandfather’s paternal grandfather was baptized as “Katarzyna” in 1843.
4.    In Wigry its subordinate parish, no way was “prenuptial agreement” going to mean anything but “ketubah”. Also in Wigry and its subordinate parish, parents didn’t “neglect” baptizing any child for four years!
5.    The Daniloviches, Chernetzkis, etc. (e.g., Kruszyńskis, Andrulewiczes, and Margiewiczes) all either somehow heard of each otherand/or were otherwise connected prior to ending up in what is now Podlaskie Voivodeship.
6.    Related to the aforementioned: branches of the Daniloviches, etc. also ended up together in Mount Carmel, Pennsylvania—in other words, Great-Granddad Czarnecki’s closer sides of his parents’ families that immigrated to Pennsylvania stuck together.


[Not previewed here]




The next few screenshots are from JewishGen. As I’ve said when I’ve written about my family history other times, they—despite what they claim—cannot copyright the information itself, although they can indeed copyright the database technology that they use for the JewishGen databases. Besides, that information was known and/or discoverable long before they were founded—let alone before I was born!

[Not previewed here]



As for the rest of my Danilovich side’s story, that can be read elsewhere. So can the story of Kirk Douglas’ side.


PS As I’ve said, I wish that Lana Wood would name Kirk Douglas before he dies—and I wish that she would name Kirk Douglas before it’s too late for her to name her sister’s rapist!

Saturday, August 5, 2017

A Woman Whom Abused Her Puppy? Or Did She Have A Severe Mental-Illness Flareup?

I wonder if she has severe mental illness such as Bipolar or Schizoaffective Disorder. Before people judge her as "trash", they need to remember that people with mental illnesses such as  Bipolar and Schizoaffective Disorders act highly unusually during mental-illness flareups. My sister has a friend whom may have Schizoaffective Disorder and even got him- or her-self in academic and legal trouble as a result of a mental-illness flareup, for example (He or she is known to have Bipolar Disorder for sure.). 

Meanwhile (and those who have read my blog previously know this), my great-great-grandmother Alexandria Czarnecki was known as "a holy terror" and "a tough cookie" whom almost caused my great-grandmother Mary Czarnecki to have a mental breakdown. Only when I saw my great-granduncle Bernie Czarnecki's death certificate did I figure it out: Great-Great-Grandma had Schizophrenia (the other mental illness of which Schizoaffective Disorder is comprised). As far as I know, Great-Granduncle Bernie was the only of my Czarnecki great-granduncles and great-grandaunts to have had it, by the way; and Great-Granddad Czarnecki seems to have not had Schizophrenia (He did have suicide-affecting Depression, though; so, he was not completely lucky in terms of escaping mental illnesses. He had his own struggles.).

Sunday, July 30, 2017

The Good, The Bad, And The Kevin Myerses And Reverend Kellys

Eerily enough, we were just talking about my dad's childhood Irish-American priest and his Anti Semitism. Sadly, there is a lot of Anti Semitism within quite a few pockets of some Irish Catholic circles....and you know what? Maybe that's another part of why his father's parents did not want his uncle marrying an Irish-American woman. 

(By the way, I've done a lot of family and other research as well as lived quite a life for being 27 years old: I can thus deduct, read between the lines, and otherwise have ways to figure out what I'm not exactly or at all being told.)

Long story short, Dad's from a family of Anusim Ashkenazim and B'nei Anusim Ashkenazim, and Pop-Pop's parents themselves were sort of intermarried: Great-Grandma believed in Jesus (and Great-Great-Grandma was not thrilled about this, as I deducted); and Great-Granddad did not (To him, shidduch shmidduch in any case, though: he wasn't in the Old Country, anyway.). Both of them, however, were not happy when Granduncle Tony wanted to marry a daughter of one of the Sugar Notch Lenahans (Her mother was the Lenahan.): "She's Irish!"

Pop-Pop himself married a daughter of a Rusnak whose father was somehow a relative of Yehoshua Rusnak (though I'm not sure that Grandma knew this at the time). Not that the family prominences figured into the marriage decisions, anyway; and even if they had, Great-Granddad had prominent-enough family himself, anyway, thanks (His cousin Katherine, e.g., married a Chokola; and long story short, the Chokolas are somehow Jewish). The point was that a Jew was a Jew, irrespective of belief; an Irisher was a Irisher, and you could bet that he or she grew up Catholic.

As if my great-grandparents were prescient about things that would turn out in the most-ironic way possible, it actually ended up going well for Granduncle Tony and (sadly) his widow (He died just after her 70th birthday and after they'd been married for 46 years.), and Pop-Pop got stuck with a certain Reverend Kelly as his family's pastor when he moved his family down to Glen Burnie and attended The Good Shepherd: he himself would fall asleep in the back of the church while everyone else attended services.

Only later, meanwhile, did I figure out that Reverend Kelly had a clear Anti-Semitic bias against us: according to my mother, whom is herself mostly from Irish-Catholic stock, my sister and I actually held out our hands correctly for Catholics—and not Episcopalian wise—after all when we attended a Christmas service at the Good Shepherd, including with begrudging Dad (and that Dad had to deal with Father Kelly helps one to understand why he turned out how he turned out—you deal with people in authority whom want to think that they know better than even God Himself, you might also turn out how Dad turned out. By the way, some are skeptical that Reverend Kelly was solely at fault—one good thing about attending what's now NDMU is that I know how many Roman Catholic teachers, laymen and clergy alike, think that they know better than God and try to teach their students to be robots instead of students).
Had I known that we're Jewish back then and that we did hold out our hands correctly after all, I would have realized that the same pastor whom hated my dad as his student back then picked on his now-grown former student's Jewish-looking children—as I've found out, we couldn't pass back then or now even if nobody would say anything—and years later, I am not surprised.

At least I (can be at least fairly certain that I) know that Reverend Kelly will have to (if he hasn't already had to) face a Jewish Jesus someday, and hearing "I never knew you!" will be (or was) painful: after all, as Corrie ten Boom stated, "You can't love God without loving the Jewish people," and she was paraphrasing the Paul of Tarsus whom reminded the gentiles at Rome that gentiles are grafted-in branches of the Tree of Life and Jews are the regrafted-in branches.

Update: After doing some quick Googling:

  1. Reverend Kelly is out of The Good Shepherd. God hath given each according to his or her works, I see. Nonetheless, he his sycophants
  2. I see nothing to indicate that he's died. Since he's still alive, then, he has had some time to reflect on what he's done throughout his life.

Wednesday, July 26, 2017

Regarding Hananya Naftali And A Disturbing Report About Him

In a Facebook group of which I'm a member, the group moderator shared a video of self-professed Jewish Christian and survivor of terrorism Hananya Naftali speaking at a UN Security Council Form. Someone objected to the sharing of the video on the grounds that Hananya Naftali may not actually be a terrorism survivor or anything else but a Messianic Jew whom deceitfully claims to have survived a terror attack in order to proselytize.

Just as I replied in the group, I'll post here for two reasons:


  1. In case my comment understandably gets deleted—after all, as I said, Hananya Naftali reflects poorly on Jewish Christians if he is lying about whether he survived a terror attack.
  2. As I implicitly replied to the original commenter, the report about Hananya Naftali is disturbing either way: that is, it's disturbing whether someone's lying about Hananya Naftali simply because he is a Jewish Christian or whether—more disturbingly—Hananya Naftali is using a Pseudo-Messianic-Jewish form of taqiyya, as what Mohammed did to promote Islam in his days has no compatibility with or equivalent to what Jesus taught, regardless of what one makes of Jesus—after all, Jesus was at least a rabbi whom taught that one should not bear false witness, and any "Messianic Jewish" form of taqiyya contravenes the Torah that Jesus taught and followed. By the way, I can find no news reports about Hananya Naftali actually having survived a terror attack in any case.
  3. I'm a bat Anusim whose ancestors survived Anti Semitism as best as they could, and—for example—I'm unfortunately sure that part of what contributed to Great-Granddad Czarnecki's decision to commit suicide was the Anti Semitism that he endured as a child—you try being a 60-year-old Anusi whom, even though you were no hero, you had a rough life and became less than heroic in many ways partly because you were affected by how you started off life: in Anti-Semitic Polish Russia and having converted to Roman Catholicism before you were even a school-aged child because of the pogroms, and thus having your family back in Poland having disowned you and your parents because you became Anusim; and then fleeing to the United States to live as an Anusi in not-much-better-but-at-least-nominally-religiously-free Pennsylvania—and you end up in the Sugar Notch area, which is part of why you have to live as an Anusi. When you're sitting around after you've lost a job due to severing three toes and your lower leg in a work-related accident with a lawnmower, you think about those first 18-21 years of your life when all you can do is sit around and think instead of work—and your flareup of Depression becomes all the more exacerbated. Were you around today, you'd want to throttle that Hananya Naftali kid if he is lying, and you'd love tell him exactly about what you survived as opposed to what he only claimed to have survived—and from what I understand, Great-Granddad (given that he had no problem being abusive towards others) would certainly not hesitate to have throttled someone if he could have and needed to have throttled someone for good reason (After all, someone who turns out to be abusive since he or she was affected by abuse may well stand up to abusers whom are like the abusers that he or she had and has faced before. Also, keep in mind that he worked in the coal mines until times became too hard for the coal mines to run in Sugar Notch—so, he had a good deal of strength prior to his work-related lawnmower accident—and he also worked at a silk mill in his teenage years.).
As I replied to the original commenter, then:

"1) I don't see how that changes that he[, Hananya Naftali] was targeted because of his ethnicity, assuming that he was telling the truth about what happened to him. 2) If he was indeed lying, I as a Jewish Christian apologize on behalf of those like Hanaya Naftali and can tell you that he reflects himself and only himself. In fact, the majority of us are far different from the caricatures that Hananya Naftali likes to make us look like, and we do not condone whatever you call―if I may―his equivalent of taqiyya, as Mohammed and Jesus―regardless whatever you make of him―are not compatible, and no equivalent of taqiyya has any place in the life of any Jewish Christian."

Tuesday, July 25, 2017

Anti Semitism Came From Outside Of A Hartford Cemetery....And Then There's The Anti Semitism In Luzerne County's Cemeteries

I have living and late relatives who were and are (including ones who currently await the Resurrection Of The Dead) in Madison and Norwalk, and all of us are B'nei Anusim. Besides, for example, I don't know where some relatives who weren't Anusim ended up; and either way, Anti Semites, whether or not they leave written graffiti (as if knocking over matzevot isn't a hateful form of graffiti just because it's unwritten) don't care whether we're Rabbinim, Kara'im, or something else (e.g., Notzrim); or openly Jewish or Anusim, whether or not we're B'nei Anusim.

As is said, it can happen here and it can happen anywhere else.

PS The (perhaps) conspiracy theorist in me says that some of the tombstones in the photos that Dad sent me were knocked over simply because they are or suspected to be matzevot; and the same (perhaps) conspiracy theorist in me suspects that that's why others have been left unmaintained. For example:
Displaying 1026161414.jpg
I'm not sure whose grave this is. However, the grave in two puctures prior, shown here below, is one of Great-Great-Granddad's cousins (the one whom proved that the sin against Natalie Wood didn't escape being perpetrated by our side of his maternal family, might I add.).


Displaying 1026161415.jpg
Another one, this after the knocked-over one. Although it hasn't been maintained, it's clearly standing upright and without any deliberate- and/or other clean-looking breaks.
By the way, all but two of the Hartford matzevot that were knocked over were knocked over to this kind of condition (The other two faced the kind of horrid fate that a matzevah in Europe may've faced.)
Meanwhile, two tombstones of people who were born within 20 years of Great-Great-Granddad (December 24, 1875; despite his tombstone giving 1877) are well maintained. One was born in 1869, and another was born in 1885. This tombstone seems to not be a matzevah (or at least a matzevah Yehudit, if you want to get technical and apply "matzevah" to any tombstone) or at least a suspected matzevah, in contrast to the two shown above that may be.


I left this in its original size on purpose. Assuming that the cemetery in the next picture is Holy Family/St. Charles Cemetery, one can see very clearly the stark contrast. Not that Great-Great-Granddad was a hero, by the way—and from what I understand, he wasn't—nonetheless, something's fishy when a tombstone in Holy Family/St. Charles looks like this in contrast to the other tombstones, especially since Great-Great-Granddad donated to its "Free Poland" fund. Also by the way, Great-Grandma (z"l) died only 10 Gregorian years ago and was laid to rest in St. Mary's as a Holy Family parishioner—it isn't like Holy Family doesn't keep track members of parishioning families whom are still in the area—in addition, given that this is why I mention Great-Grandma, she received a prayer shawl (which was not specifically a tallit) that my aunt Mary made for her and was quite thrilled to receive it (I know why, and Great-Grandma apparently did, too 🙂—had I known before she died and at least before the last time that I saw her 🙁! —in other words, only looking back on the times that I saw her and looking back with what I found out in mind did I understand that she was an alter-bubeh.)

Incidentally, St. Mary's does not allow stones on top of any tombstones ("No crushed decorative stones, pebbles, shells or similar materials shall be placed on or around monuments or markers.")....never mind that Jesus was Jewish (and is Jewish if you believe that he's Mashiach like I do); but, okay, then. 🙄 Also never mind that the stones left on matzevot are never "decorative" (While I was looking for the source where I read that no stones are allowed on top of any tombstone, I didn't remember St. Mary's Cemetery having this much of a contempt for Jews. If only we could get Great-Grandma and other proud stholts Yidn out of there, and get each of them among lantzmen and lantzfroyen whom believe as he or she believes, since it happens from within and not only from without—unless you want to count as part of the "without" group the Anti Semites whom affected them to become Anusim, "hidden Jews", regardless of their beliefs.)
This isn't to mention that since I clearly didn't pass—unbeknownst to me until a friend told me, "I figured that you're Jewish. You look Jewish."—at least quite a few ancestors who did know that they're Jewish from the beginnings of their lives didn't pass, no matter how much they tried and/or no matter how much anybody who at least suspected that they're Jewish didn't say.

By the way, Holy Family/St. Charles Cemetery in Sugar Notch is a small one (so are cemetery such as Holy Cross Polish National Cemetery, where Great-Great-Granddad's brother Felix is buried). There is, thus, little to no chance that even some stranger would've just passed over a lonely grave of an apparently-Polish or -otherwise-gentile parishioner in tight-knit, everybody-apparently-knows-somebody-or-of-somebody-somehow Sugar Notch.

Friday, July 7, 2017

Re Tr**p's Freudian Slip Re Auschwitz: At Least...

We now know what Tr**p really thinks about Jews, people with disabilities overall, and others—as if we didn't before! Last night, a video of him calling the "Warsaw Ghetto Uprising" one of the "evils beyond description" that "the Polish people endured" came out, and you can hear his comments from the 0:40-0:53 mark.

By the way—as I've said—I lost relatives in Auschwitz, and my cousin Magdalena Rusznak () was one of then. Also by the way—and as I've also said—I haven't forgotten that threat that I received—that is, the one from the "physically fit German American [whom] can think of a place for [me]"—and you just don't forget those kind of threats if you've received them, especially if you have, for example:

  1.  Cerebral Palsy and your own set of mental illnesses (like I do) 
  2. a cousin whom died of Schizophrenia due to the ableist T4 program (and Magdalena had Schizophrenia) 
  3. a great-great-grandmother whom had Schizophrenia (which explains why "she was a holy terror" and "a tough cookie") and through whom you are a fifth- and fourth-generation pogrom survivor (as her son Anthony came here with her in order to escape the pogroms, and after being disowned because of becoming an Anusi because of his parents becoming Anusim)
  4. a great-granduncle whom was a DOW veteran of WW2 and whom died of a Schizophrenia flareup (which finally helped you figure out what your great-great-grandmother had when you found about it

Monday, July 3, 2017

A Very-Open Letter To Cory Galbraith

With all due respect, I would imagine that souls like those of the late Elie Wiesel, Primo Levi, and Billy Wilder were a lot more tortured. In fact, Primo Levi committed suicide and Billy Wilder had to yell "THOSE BASTARDS KILLED MY MOTHER!" at an actor whom turned out to be a Nazi sympathizer.

I say this as one whom, for example, suffers Depression, has a late-great-great-grandmother whose Bipolar Disorder and Post-Partum Depression effected her to suffer Alzheimer's Disease and die in her 60s, has a late great-great-grandmother whom suffered Schizophrenia (as did my late great-granduncle Bernie), was a pogrom survivor (along with my great-grandfather Anthony Czarnecki, whom had Depression and committed suicide), and lost relatives in the Holocaust; and I lost a cousin whom was murdered in the T4 Program due to having Schizophrenia.

But then again, perhaps, what do I know? Perhaps the suffering of Holocaust survivors and other Holocaust-affected people, pogrom survivors (including 4th-generation survivors like me) and other pogrom-affected people, and those with mental illnesses besides Vincent van Gogh meant and mean absolutely nothing. Perhaps Vincent van Gogh suffered worsely than any Holocaust- and pogrom-affected person would ever suffer by having lived and heard about as relatives were gassed, shot, stabbed, hanged, burned, and otherwise murdered; and any other person whom suffered Depression and mental illnesses. By the way, the Holocaust was in Germany as well as Russia, where Stalin implemented a "Final Solution" plan in 1948.

If I don't know whether Vincent van Gogh was "history's most tortured soul", though, then living fellow Holocaust survivors of Elie Wiesel et. al., pogrom survivors and fellow legacy bearers of mine, and others besides me and Vincent van Gogh whose minds and families' minds are and were afflicted by mental illnesses do. 

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

In Response To A Friend's Facebook Post, And Then In Response Another Person's Replies (With Some Additions)

I maintain that "Coker" (1977) needs to be overturned. After all, being in support of capital punishment for rape is being pro life. As I chimed in on the original post, and then replied to the friend of the friend (names omitted):

I myself am pro life, and I guarantee that rape would happen less were "Coker" (1977) overturned. An overturn would effect an automatic overturning of "Kennedy" (2008), by the way, and I say that rapists should face the possibility of capital punishments since they've all but left their victims physically dead. Of course, the rapists who also physically murder their victims (including by effecting victims' deaths due to STDs, suicides, and fatal injuries besides STDs) also ought to face the possibility of capital punishments. 

I don't want to see rapists be able to take lives anymore, and I don't advocate capital punishment for rapists lightly. In my own families' cases:



  1. A cousin of my mom was gang raped in college.
  2.  I'm pretty sure that one of her sisters was raped either by a priest before she was a teen or even by Father Maskell himself (Mom denies the possibility since my aunt apparently defended him, though my grandmother I don't deny itI even told Mom that she could've been Stockholmed,) That aunt, by the way, died nine years and a week ago due to alcoholism that onset when she was 13 (She was born in November 1951 and was the first graduate of Keough, which opened in 1965.). She also told my sister that she liked Jesus, but not the Church. Looking back and even right after she died,  I knew that (when I saw the pictures at the funeral home) she was a pretty-enough young girl for perverted priests to want to target her.
  3. A cousin of my dad (Ziggy Churnetski) participated in a gang rape in the 1920s (and he was sadly in prison for only five years and had to pay a fine of only $500. He even eventually married, and I have no idea whether his wife was his victim.) 
  4. Another cousin of my dad raped someone else and murdered another person. (I wish that his victim's sister, Lana Wood, would come out with it, by the way—as I've said, there's something in that Danilovich water, and I should've figured that rape wouldn't escape our side of the family. Ziggy was Great-Granddad's once-removed cousin.)
  5. In short, I've heard about and seen what rapists can do to people.
I also don't find abortion acceptable in any case (though I used to find abortion acceptable in cases of rape and incest—God decided that my being fully pro life would take my now-ex younger stepsister, of all people, pointing out to me that abortion would be an unfair punishment to the baby, and she wasn't exactly the best stepsister in the world). In fact, if for nothing else, keeping a rape-conceived baby might be a practical measure in terms of getting a DNA sample from him or her to figure out or confirm who raped his or her mother. Besides, there are many couples whom want to adopt children; and my mom's cousin's husband ended up adopting her child when they as a couple could not have children.

(By the way, I hope that my now-ex stepsisters can see that my sister and I weren't talking slanderously when we pointed out what my dad is like—and even though, thank God, he never sexually abused us, verbal and other non-sexual abuse is still abuse—and my now-ex stepmother seems to have seen that. Incidentally, I feel sorry for my dad at this point—he's repeated the "Hurt people hurt people" cycle, and his life choices have caught up to him.)

Monday, June 19, 2017

Re People With Mental Illnesses Having Guns: Should We Be Sitting Ducks For Ableists?

Some people with mental illnesses actually do need guns. For example, vulnerable people who may well be targeted due to have mental illnesses need guns to defend themselves. As for Tr**p, he actually hates people with disabilities, including those whom have mental illnesses.


Thus, this ableist ploy by Tr**p to demonize people with mental illnesses may well backfire on him when his Tr**pites whom are committing hate crimes may realize that people with mental illnesses will not allowed themselves to have people step on them.

As for me, I wish that I had and could use a gun to defend myself against anyone whom would target me due to my Depression, OCD/Anxiety, and/or ADD alone (and wasn't getting a threat from a "physically fit German American" due to being a Jew with disabilities enough?).


Besides, look at how the Nazis were partly able to implement T4: they made it illegal for Jews in Europe to be armed, and (as I found out via JewishGen) I lost a cousin whom was murdered because she had Schizophrenia:

Lodz Ghetto Hospital Death Records


Searching for Surname (phonetically like) : RUSZNAK
1 matching record found.
Run on Sun, 18 Jun 2017 22:55:09 -0600

NameAddress
Occupation
BornDied
Cause
CommentsSource
List Date
Page
Line
RUSZNAK, MagdalenaV. Str. 10 
Bedienerin 
1904
Kaschau 
27-Jun-1942 
Schizophrenie 
 Hospital Records
29-Jun-1942
2
54 


 

Lumping in all people with mental illnesses with those such as Adam Lanza, whom refused to get help and whom committed a mass murder-suicide shooting, is wrong and playing right into Tr**p's hands.