Why I've Suffered So Much: At Least Partly Because of That Kapo Mary Rusnak Gaydos

I don't exactly remember who Jack Feldman is descended from, by the way; but I begin to suspect more and more that his Chron's-- besides his trief eating-- comes from his Fosko-Rusnak matriarch being a kapo as well. My side (the Fosko-Rusnak-Gaydos side) has been visited for certain:

Numbers 14:18
‘The LORD is longsuffering and abundant in mercy, forgiving iniquity and transgression; but He by no means clears the guilty, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children to the third and fourth generation.’


I mean, I don't think that we can any more into entering the abyss zone than having four of the five Rusnak-Gaydos children (Grandaunt Mary Ann and Grandma included) being absolutely wicked (The only one who would not be wicked by doing or enabling any wickedness was Grandaunt Helen, who I didn't know was habat tzedekah until after she was gone.), having even some of habnei v'banot shel habat tzedekah take after the bnei-v'banot ra'im (Ashley and Matt, I'll name you as two of them. Shame on you for not acknowledging our Yiddishkeit and Eloheinu v'Elohim Avinu.), and having some of us bnei v'banot suffer abuse which we have not (or at least tried not to have) perpetuated the cycle of.


While I'm on the subject of Matt, by the way, why does he have Spina Bifida? And why do I have Cerebral Palsy? And why does Jack have Chron's (if his Fosko-Rusnak matriarch was indeed also a wicked kapo)?


Deuteronomy 7:13
And He will love you and bless you and multiply you; He will also bless the fruit of your womb and the fruit of your land, your grain and your new wine and your oil, the increase of yourcattle and the offspring of your flock, in the land of which He swore to your fathers to give you.


Let me give you a hint: Great-Grandma Gaydos and her zerim sure haven't been blessed:

Leviticus 21:17-24

New King James Version (NKJV)

¹⁷ “Speak to Aaron, saying: ‘No man of your descendants in succeeding generations, who has anydefect, may approach to offer the bread of his God. ¹⁸ For any man who has a defect shall not approach: a man blind or lame, who has a marred face or any limb too long, ¹⁹ a man who has a broken foot or broken hand, ²⁰ or is a hunchback or a dwarf, or a man who has a defect in his eye, or eczema or scab, or is a eunuch. ²¹ No man of the descendants of Aaron the priest, who has a defect, shall come near to offer the offerings made by fire to the LORD. He has a defect; he shall not come near to offer the bread of his God. ²² He may eat the bread of his God, both the most holy and the holy; ²³ only he shall not go near the veil or approach the altar, because he has a defect, lest he profane My sanctuaries; for I the LORD sanctify them.’”
²⁴ And Moses told it to Aaron and his sons, and to all the children of Israel.


Hint two: 


While we may not be koheinim, let me ask you this: if being one "who has a defect" (including one that results in the said one being "blind or lame, who has a marred face or any limb too long, a man who has a broken foot or broken hand, or is a hunchback or a dwarf") is even a (for a lack of a better term) just-because curse to zerim shel Aharon; how likely would you think that any one of those defects could be inflicted even on non koheinim who are or whose predecessors were kapos?


Numbers 14:18
‘The LORD is longsuffering and abundant in mercy, forgiving iniquity and transgression; but He by no means clears the guilty, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children to the third and fourth generation.’


As I said, by the way, being crippled and being sickened (with me, Matt, and Jack-- if his Fosko-Rusnak matriarch was indeed also a wicked kapo-- included) aren't the only curses which the zerim of the kapo Fosko Rusnaks-- especially those of Mary Rusnak Gaydos-- have had to endure.

So Far, What Seemed Like a Miracle Is a Shattered Dream....

I'm not going to get into what the miracle is, especially if it turns out to be a shattered dream; since (even though I'm a Jewish Christian) I don't want to (for a lack of a better term) jinx any chances of my so-far-shattered dream being what I had thought (or hoped) that it was going to be. To make a long story short; I don't presently have all that I need to fulfill the dream, and I could possibly be being presented with a possibly-false-choice scenario wherein fulfilling my dream and going to college for at least this semester is regarded.

I'm not asking for money. I'm asking for prayer, prayer that (as the Bible says) G-d will provide; though I am much less than many who have been provided for and are being (and/or will be) provided for. I'm not Avraham or Moshe, or so many others who have been provided for. I'm not the starving child in Africa or the sexual-abuse victim (who, in many cases, is-- in a sense-- luckier than I am because he or she suffers so much more here, and gets more sympathy from both Heaven and Earth-- and more reward in Heaven because of his or her suffering. As I've blogged about before, I can't even get sympathy or empathy for what little I've been through in comparison-- in fact, I usually get the opposite. That is, I get the opposite of sympathy and empathy.).

As I said, I'm asking for just prayer, prayer that (as the Bible says) G-d will provide; though I am much less than everyone from Avraham and Moshe, to the starving child in Africa and the sexual-abuse victim. Besides, the fulfillment of my dream may help that I am exalted above those who have abused and hated me, and who even abuse (including ignore) and hate me still.

So I Read A Friend From A Letter, And...

Just pray for me and pray for the friend. To make a long story short, because of my OCD/Anxiety/Depression/unmedicated-mild ADD, possible Aspbeger's, Diplegic Spastia Cerebral Palsy, and "friends" and family either abandoning or even outright abusing me at various points in my life; I realistically have ups and downs, trust issues, etc.. I'm not going to trust everybody (Don't ask; I've already learned not to trust everybody, long story short. There's wisdom in wariness.) and I'm not going to stop speaking the truth (or at least trying to speak the truth) on my family and other people, and religion and other matters.

But from now on, if you abandon or even abuse me, I won't get too mad about it; I'll just let whatever you do against me be your own damned problem. I'll let that I'm so used to being abandoned and abused help me to not even be phased or surprised anymore by any abandonment and abuse that I receive. And as I've told some people; when you need me, I might not be there for you because I might not be able to be-- and then what are you going to do?

I See That Some People Read My Open Letter And...

Removed me on Facebook, Twitter, etc. Good! I don't need you, anyway. As I wrote:


 I define Facebook as "Face"book-- meaning that I'm not hiding my face or anything else from you. If I have something not to hide, I don't hide it. I didn't ask you to agree with me on everything, but as I've said, I can back up what I say. If you want to agree to disagree and even not debate, you can choose to keep any reservations to yourself. 


I also stated, "I will always back up what I say." That you can't back up your disagreements with me is a shame. You're the kind (at least some of you are the kind) who "have affected me to state, 'At points, if I weren't a Christian, I wouldn't be a Christian.'" You don't know how to agree to disagree and still maintain love and friendships-- and you even have the hutzpah to go behind my back to my mom and my sister. What a shame! 

The Free Book Finally Came-- This Is Not An Advertisement

I finally got the free book to give away. As I said, "The book is not intended to be returned; so as I said, give

the book to a loved one or loved one's loved one, or an acquaintance or whoever else is Jewish and is curious

about Yeshua if you don't intended to keep it. The book is not meant for gentiles-- they can go to church, or to

the public library, or to more gentile-demographic places to find books about Yeshua for gentiles."



Chosen People Ministries really does prefer that the book is read by Jewish people; though they do state, "We

are expecting, by God's grace, to send out thousands [of copies of Isaiah 53 Explained] to Jews and non-Jews

who need to know the Lord." Just send me your address, and I'll get the book to you or have Chosen People

Ministries send you a copy. 

E. Michael Jones Has Ulterior Motives and No Authority To Speak on Modern Judaism or Catholicism

Besides, E. Michael Jones Wikipedia all the fodder that they needed. Firstly, E. Michael Jones is an Anti Semite ad has no authority to speak on Modern Judaism, covering his Anti Semitism with the following:


"Jones has stated publicly that he considers modern Judaism to be a wicked ideology, but that he condemns criticism of Jews based upon race.^[3] In February, 2008, due to a complaint of anti-Semitism from the Southern Poverty Law Center, the School of Architecture at The Catholic University of America cancelled a lecture series in which Jones was scheduled to speak. In an interview with The Washington Times Jones said that he rejected racism in all of its forms, consistent with Catholic teaching^[2] and responded to the cancellation in an article in Culture Wars.^[4]"

While Modern Non-Messianic Judaism is-- unintentionally and intentionally-- indeed wicked, E. Michael Jones

is not a Jew and thus his little to no authority to speak on the issue of Judaism. Whatever authority he did have,

he dashed along with his credibility by coming from a Non-Evangelical Catholic angle. As I have blogged,

Non-Evangelical Catholicism (Roman, Byzantine, and otherwise) is Pseudo-Christian, Anti-Semitic

wickedness.  

Myself being born into an Anusi (Roman and Byzantine Catholic) and Roman Catholic family, baptized

Anusit and Roman Catholic (since  my dad was English Catholic-- Episcopalian-- and is still not open about

his Jewish heritage; and my mom had my sister and me baptized by a Roman Catholic priest who was a

friend of her late Evangelical Catholic, getting-ready-to-leave-Catholicism-when-he-died dad), and raised

Anusit and Episcopalian (and not knowing that I'm Jewish until I was 18); I have more authority to speak on

the issue of both than does E. Michael Jones. As far as I know, Ex-Professor Jones has never pointed to

'Amos 5:21-27 to prove how Modern Non-Messianic Jews both inadvertently and deliberately worship

Sikkut v'Kiyun.

In fact, given how little Catholic are encouraged to read the Bible, especially the first three books of Tanakh
(and the fourth, Hadashah, being so muddied up by Non-Evangelical Catholicism over the years to do

awful works against Yeshua and Paul's own people); E. Michael Jones probably couldn't tell you where

'Amos is located in Tanakh-- whether in the traditional Jewish (including Messianic Jewish) or the traditional

Christian order.

Also, if E. Michael Jones really knew Catholicism for what Catholicism is, he wouldn't have had the

following views on it:

"Jones then obtained his Ph.D. from Temple University and began to teach at Saint Mary's College, of Notre Dame, Indiana. To Jones' displeasure, he found this college to be what he considered to be (in the words of Michael W. Cuneo who interviewed him) "the antithesis of what a Catholic college should be", being pro-choice, feminist and secular. He made little effort to conceal his views, leading to conflicts with many faculty, his department chairwoman and eventually the college's president. His department, which viewed him as a religious absolutist, decided against renewing his contract after his first year.<sup>[1]"


Jones needs to wake up and smell Catholicism for what it is. He obviously didn't learn from St. Mary's or

Catholic University of America. Perhaps he'd like to go to then-College, now-University of Notre Dame

Maryland and look over the whole history of Catholicism and how Evangelical Catholicism (and Evangelical

Catholics such as Jan Hus, John Wycliffe, Teresa De Avila, Edith Stein, and Abraham Sh'mu'eloff) were all

treated (the first two victims of being murdered for "heresy", the third having her Jewishness and the fact that

her family was victim to the Catholic-started Inquisition almost even ignored by the Catholic Church, Edith

Stein being murdered by self-proclaimed "Christian" Catholic and Lutheran Nazis-- and the Catholic Church

doing nothing to save Edith Stein, one of their own--, and Sh'mu'eloff having his Jewishness ignored by the

Catholic Church when Sh'mu'eloff was a Roman, English, and Byzantine Catholic throughout his lifetime.

Only Evangelical-- including Jewish-- Catholic and other Evangelical, and other sources bring up that

Sh'mu'eloff was even proud of his Jewish heritage and rebuked that many Sabra'im and 'olim would not

speak Lashon Ivrit).</sup>

Some Lies That Anti Missionaries and Anti Semites Say

1. "Jews don't believe in Jesus."
2. "Jesus didn't claim to be the Messiah."
3. "Jesus didn't claim to be G-d."
4. "You can't be a Jew if you believe in Jesus".
5. "You're no longer a Jew if you believe in Jesus."
6. "There are no Jews or gentiles in Jesus; there are only Christians."
7. "The Jews killed Jesus."
8. "All Jews are Anti Palestinian."
9. "The Holocaust didn't happen."
10. "The Holocaust was deserved."
11. "Adolf Hitler and the Nazis were Christians."
12. "Zionism is racism."
13. "Anti Zionism is not Anti Semitism."
14. "Once you become a Christian or Messianic Jew, you have to stop keeping Torah."
15. "Once  you become a Christian or Messianic Jew, you have to keep all of Torah."
16. "Jesus invented a whole new religion."
17. "Jesus was a Self-Hating Jew."
18. "Jesus' followers turned Jesus into the Messiah and invented a whole new religion."
19. "Paul turned Jesus into the Messiah  and invented a whole new religion ."
20. "Jesus' followers were Self-Hating Jews."
21. "Paul was a Self-Hating Jew."
22. "You become a gentile once you believe in Jesus."
23. "You become a gentile once you're baptized."
24. "Martin Luther was a Christian."
25. "The Crusaders were Christians."
26. "The Inquisitors were Christians."
27. "Catholics [excluding Evangelical Catholics, "fundamentalists"] are Christians."
28. "The Jews stole Palestine from the Palestinians."
29. "The Exodus didn't really happen."
30. "The Jewish Diaspora is just like any other Diaspora."
31. "Ashkenazic Jews are Edomites."
32. "The Talmud is as valid as Tanakh."
33. "Jews can be saved without Jesus."
34. "Jews can be saved by keeping Torah."
35. "Jews own everything [e.g., banks, Hollywood]."
36. "The Church is the New Israel."
37. "G-d no longer has a covenant with ethnic Jews-- at least until the End of Days."
38. "You're Jewish only if your mother is Jewish."
39. "You're either fully Jewish or at least Matrilineally Jewish, or you aren't Jewish."
40. "Jews for Jesus is trying to accomplish the destruction of the Jewish people that Hitler wanted to finish."
41. "You become as an ethnic Jew once you convert to Judaism."
42. "Only 6,000,000 or so Jews were murdered in the Holocaust."
43. "Jews for Jesus is a branch of the Southern Baptist Convention."
44. "Christians are Zionists only to convert to Jews to Christianity."