A Reflection Re "Heaven, 9/11 Memorial Version"

I can only imagine how, I suppose to a similar extent, my paternal grandfather's father and living siblings felt on September 11, 1922 and subsequent days. From what I understand, my great-great-granddad Julian Czarnecki was absolutely no hero—or if he was one, his bad facets outweighed his good ones. Nonetheless, his death must've really weighed on my great-granddad and his living siblings (one of whom would follow her father only slightly over 2.75 years later).

Great-Granddad was going to be 18 that October (and to compound the worst matters in his life, he turned 25 on a day on which a 25th birthday would not be joyous to anyone—Black Thursday). So on that birthday (and subsequent birthdays), he had to remember the loss of his father (with whom he had a conflicted relationship—or at least I'd be surprised if he didn't have a conflicted relationship with him—and subsequent birthdays would become even worse as the years passed and worse events kept happening—in fact, his 35th birthday had the fresh pain of Black Thursday's 10th anniversary and the only-almost-two-months old invasion of Poland).

As for Great-Granddad's youngest sibling, she wasn't yet even nine months old when Great-Great-Granddad died—and the oldest surviving one had, if you count 13 as the bat-mitzvah age, become a bat-mitzvah that year (and she was the one whom followed Great-Great-Granddad into death on June 23, 1925).

At least none of them were around to see 9/11. However, my great-granddad's widow—to whom he was quite abusive, and with whom she obviously had a conflicted relationship—was, and so were four of his five children (One died seven hours after birth, right before the 10th anniversary of his aunt Regina's death.). While I do not know whether my great-grandma ever met her father-in-law or her sister-in-law Regina, I know that she was well aware that September 11th always carried pain for my great-granddad—as carried every October 24th, and not just because of the September 11th before his 18th birthday—and both were born in Jewish homes (he in Anti-Semitic Polish Russia, she in an Anusi home in Ashley-Hanover Township, Pennsylvania) and raised in Anusi homes, and they thus knew the pain of every passing September 11th (on which Great-Great-Granddad may not have died had his family not disowned him for becoming an Anusi) and October 24th.

I can only imagine how the pain of every other September 11th hit her on 9/11, and I never did ask her because I didn't know our family story—not even that we were and are Jews—not to mention that I saw her only once every year from some time in the 90s until 2005, and I was dealing with an abusive dad (It's like the Passover question that the fourth child doesn't ask—he or she doesn't ask because he or she doesn't know how to ask or maybe even to ask at all.).

I wonder what she thought—or at least would've thought—if she heard this song—I also wonder the same about Pop-Pop (whom was sadly, as Granduncle Tony stated, "Like father, like son.") and Granduncle Tony (whom unexpectedly died on July 31 2014, three days after what would've been his mother's 101st birthday). I also certainly wonder what Great-Granddad would've thought and what Granduncle Red (Francis "Red" Czarnecki, whom died in 1985) would've thought (BTW, he was called "Red" because of his red hair—which, as I later found out, is, so to speak, a dead giveaway of if someone is Jewish in Poland, as is Brown hair for someone whom's a Brown-haired Jew, as Ethnic Poles are indigenously light-haired and light-eyed).

A Quick Update On Reilly & Camille

The "gwirls" are doing well and are back to normal. In fact:

1. Both Reilly and Camille were back to normal within a day, and Reilly was back to normal within 12-18 hours!
2. Both Reilly and Camille are their lovably-bratty and brattily-lovable selves.
3. Both Reilly and Camille freaked out with the groundhog being back—in fact, Camille was scared of it when she went to try to "go potty" the night after the dental cleaning, and Reilly wanted to chase it yesterday!
4. Reilly is back to her jealous self—she even zoomed into the family room at the right side of the couch and did a dominance show on Camille when Camille went to say "Hi!" to someone! It was surreal—like she was in a commercial or a movie, or a video game!
5. Poor Reilly has to deal with "Momma", although (for good and bad) she tolerates her!

Why I Am Disappointed In Sadie Robertson, Even Though I Do Not Have An Eating Disorder

Sadie Robertson, one of the "Duck Dynasty" kids, struggled with (based on the way that it sounds) Bulimia, given that even her mother had no idea that she had an eating disorder (and especially those with paternal and maternal eyes can notice significant weight losses). Per "Frequently Asked Questions About Eating Disorders" per Johns Hopkins Medicine:

"Both anorexia nervosa and bulimia are characterized by an overvalued drive for thinness and a disturbance in eating behavior. The main difference between diagnoses is that anorexia nervosa is a syndrome of self-starvation involving significant weight loss of 15 percent or more of ideal body weight, whereas patients with bulimia nervosa are, by definition, at normal weight or above."

 Why I am disappointed in Sadie Robertson, then, is her attitude re "tak[ing] authority over [her thoughts]":

"'The day I prayed for the Lord to enlighten my eyes to see His standard of beauty, is the day my whole life changed," she said. "Do these old thoughts come back from time to time? Absolutely, but it is my job to take authority over them.'"

For many fellow self-identifying Christians of Sadie Robertson with eating disorders and other mental illnessesⁱ, it's not as simple as the "Duck Dynasty" star makes it—and people like her whom use religion falsely give many a "Just pray and it'll mostly go away" idea to consider.

In fact, quite a few Christians and people in other religious groups with eating disorders and other mental illnesses think, "If only it were that easy!" and may even become antithetical toward religion as a result. Faith communities are supposed to be there to help those with eating disorders and other mental illnesses, not have an "Oh, ye of little faith; that's why you have a mental illness!"

Also, not everyone has the resources (e.g., money, groups of social networks, significant social status) that Sadie Robertson has. I even go as far as to add that Sadie Robertson may as well have kept her struggle with her eating disorder private instead of having talked about it in such a thoughtless and cavalier way.

As a Biblical proverb goes¹, "Even a fool is counted wise when he holds his peace; [w]hen he shuts his lips, he is considered perceptive." There is only foolishness in using religion to make light of serious problems, especially when the person whom makes light of the problem assumes at some level that she or he is the only one struggling with the problem.

One's making light of her or his her given mental illness (whether it is an eating disorder or another type of mental illness) with a "Pray for it to go away" attitude may even have a deadly affect on others, since "[d]eath and life are in the power of the tongue."

After all, people who feel like "I just don't have enough faith. I can't do this, anyway" may even commit suicide as a result²; and for people with eating disorders, suicide may come in the form of deliberately starving themselves to death. Sadie Robertson needs to remember that every time that she begins to assume that it's as simple as "Pray for it to go away" for everyone with eating disorders.

ⁱ Including myself—and I myself have OCD/Anxiety, Depression, and ADD

¹ I quote the New King James Version, via Bible Gateway, here.

² I don't know whether this was a motive in the suicides of Great-Granddad Czarnecki, Great-Great-Grandma Rusnak's brothers Ferencz "Frank" and Andrȧs "Alexander" Foczko, and 

Great-Great-Grandma Rusnak's father (Istvȧn Foczko; also "Focko"). My family's case was and is different, as we are Anusim and B'nei Anusim whose ancestors became and lived as Anusim due to Anti Semitism in Eastern Europe and the United States, and mental illness set offs and flareups in our family indeed have been affected by the dynamics of being Anusim and B'nei Anusim—including the dynamics of family secrecies.

Excerpt From My Upcoming Book (Language Warning): "The Summary Of the Case For Saving The Old Farmhouse..."

Firstly, how the case to save the late Katherine Ushinsky Gajdos’ house is related to shit that I can’t make up:

1.    With my grandaunt Helen Gaydos Wojnar (z”l)—my paternal grandmother’s oldest sibling—being long deceased, her widower and children had decided to tear down her (and my grandmother’s) paternal grandmother’s old farmhouse down without even considering the historical ramifications of tearing down the farmhouse.

2.    Grandaunt Helen’s (and Grandma’s) sister MaryAnn once again told a classic bubbe meise that—I’m sure that—she still hasn’t told anybody: after all, the historical significance of the farmhouse begins with the fact that Anna née Jaszová was not “Maria Anna Yzchinski” by birth. As I mentioned in a telephone conversation and further explained to my father in a text message—since, as I type (on September 6-7, 2017/Elul 15-16, 5777), he’s visited one of Grandaunt Helen’s sons three times while he’s been down in Florida—I understandably wondered if Grandaunt Helen’s widower and descendants left up the farmhouse, which I’d seen the times that we were up on the former Gaydos farmstead (where the Gaydos-Wojnar cabin is).

3.     Bugs, rotting wood, excursions of wildlife within the farmhouse, apparently-common-across-Pennsylvania houses like that, and other given excuses for tearing down the Gaydos Farmhouse are no excuses at all.

4.    Until I brought up the possibilities of renovation or replica building, nobody even considered leaving up the farmhouse.

I gave my father the short version of the historical significance of the Gaydos Farmhouse:

“Mickey Haslin was Great-Granddad Gaydos' maternal cousin. They had the common grandparent of Anna (Szuszanna?) née Jaszová (Yashová), divorced from Jan Haszlinsky and remarried to Jan Uszinsky (Ushinsky). Her parents were Jan and Eva Polinová Jasz (Yash). She was Jewish as were her parents, and as was Jan Uszinsky.

“That is why Great-Granddad identified as "Russian"—his mom, Mickey Haslin's only parental aunt, was born as Katarina Szuszanna Uszinskyová to Slovakian-Jewish parents of Russian-Jewish descent in Gaboltov, Slovakian-Austrian Hungary. Mickey Haslin seems to have done the same—his father was George Hazlinsky, and not a single one of his kids was a "Mary" (even for the traditional Jewish usage for "Miriam". His kids were named Mercedes, Kathleen, and Michael.

“They used a mix of Ashkenazi and Sephardi naming customs, by the way—quite a few Ashkenazim overall, irrespective of beliefs re Jesus or amounts of Sephardi heritage, seem to have done this. "MaryAnn", BTW, could be used for "Miriam Chanah".) That alone makes the farmhouse significant if you ask me—i.e., the Crypto-Jewish paternal aunt of Mickey Haslin and widow of a Crypto Jew (a son of Jan and Anna Hommová Gajdosz) owned that farmhouse as a widow whom posthumously became the paternal grandmother-in-law to one of the three IRS agents whom would help bring Nixon down.

“Also, BTW, Ashkenazi Crypto Jews and their descendants (Anusim Ashkenazim v'B'nei Anusim Ashkenazim) are probably as numerous as Sephardi ones—even John Kerry would be John Kohn and Madeline Albright was born Madeline Korbelová, e.g.. Cameron Kerry is whom is called a "ba'al teshuvah", meanwhile, whereas John Kerry and Joan Kerry identify as Jewish Catholics; and Madeline Albright is a Jewish Episcopalian.”

In other words, the seven following simple words sum up any tearing down of the farmhouse of Katherine Susan Ushinsky Gaydos: a big mistake of literally-historical proportions!

So, At Least One Elderly Person Died In Her House During Hurricane Harvey's First Days In Houston...

Whatever language you speak:

1. No, people! Check on your neighbors!
2. ¡No, pueblo! ¡Cuidan a tus vecinos!
3. לא, אנשים! ואהבת לרעך כמוך!

As I recall, the woman was 83 years old and couldn't just leave Houston! Thus, everybody in Hurricane Irma's path whom can help others needs to help those whom can't just evacuate from their homes and whom otherwise can't help themselves! 

Generalized(!) Anesthesia, And How Reilly & Camille Are Doing

So, a worried "Momma"/"Auntie Nicole" called Banfield this morning after "Mom-Mom" dropped off Reilly and Camille, and just got an update from "Mo. From what "Momma"/"Auntie Nicole" heard:

1. Reilly and Camille were under generalized (not local) anesthesia.
2.  The surgery went on for 15 minutes, and occurred at about 10:30 or 11:30 ("Momma" heard at 9:22 that Reilly and Camille had to wait for one to two hours while the vet spayed two com-pup-triots of theirs.).
3. This morning and as of now, both Reilly and Camille were and are fine. They were and are generally well behaved—they only barked when "Mom-Mom left".
4. They're getting a normal heartrate and other normal vital signs back—their heartrate was low while they were under anesthesia(!).

Anesthesia? One Had Better Believe That....

Despite that Reilly's and Camille's previous teeth-cleaning surgery went well, "Momma"/"Auntie Nicole" is scared for Reilly and Camille (as is "Auntie Michelle"/"Mimi"). Besides:

1. Reilly and Camille are going to be dropped off at the vet at 7:00-7:30 in the morning.
2. They will not have had treats since 7:30 tonight or their morning "num nums" at 7:00.
3. They already don't understand why they can't have treats for "good peedies".
4. Despite that Reilly is getting localized anesthesia and even did well with generalized anesthesia when she was spayed, Reilly is a 14.5-pound adult puppy whom could be easily adversely affected by anesthesia—and "Momma" as a 5'0"-5'1" human whom weighs about 124 pounds had an awful experience with anesthesia when she had an ITB Pump put into her (though it was mostly caffeine withdrawal that affected her to not hold even water down by the fourth day of recovery—although having to have the oxygen tubes put back in once after she woke up from the anesthesia was enough of a sign that the anesthesia affected her somewhat and made the caffeine withdrawal worse).

Scared-for-Reilly "Momma"? Scared-for-Camille "Auntie Nicole"? You bet, and both "Momma"/"Auntie Nicole" and "Auntie Michelle"/"Mimi" ask people to pray on Reilly's and Camille's behalves.