A Few Fosko-Rusnak Pictures Later, And...

I'm learning that: 

1. I wasn't kidding about Vilmosz et. al., was I? "Who has believed our report? And to whom has the arm of the Lord been revealed?" What the Hell did you do, Great-Great-Granddad? Besides the obvious (You, along with your daughter, destroyed many of Vilmosz's side of the family.), you destroyed yourself. Unlike Moshe achinu—whose "eyes were not dim nor his natural vigor diminished" when he was 120—, you looked like you came from the crypt at 69—and you left behind a curse, too: "‘The Lord is longsuffering and abundant in mercy, forgiving iniquity and transgression; but He by no means clears the guilty, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children to the third and fourth generation.’" I gave you the benefit of the doubt because you were so old—and the picture shows that Vilmosz reached out to you! You worked as a church sexton for years after you had to quit working at the coal mines—your wear and tear came from your destruction of Vilmosz, Zoli, et. al.; from your sending them to their murders!
2. We assimilated. Yes; we can eat treif, but Jewish—let alone Levite—systems weren't made for that. "All things are lawful for me, but not all things are helpful; all things are lawful for me, but not all things edify." "Jeshurun grew fat and kicked; You grew fat, you grew thick, You are obese! Then he forsook God who made him, And scornfully esteemed the Rock of his salvation."
3. I'm proud to have escaped. "I will take you, one from a city and two from a family, and I will bring you to Zion."
4. I don't need your recognition: 

And of Levi he said:

“Let Your Thummim and Your Urim be with Your holy one,Whom You tested at Massah,And with whom You contended at the waters of Meribah, Who says of his father and mother,‘I have not seen them’;Nor did he acknowledge his brothers,Or know his own children;For they have observed Your wordAnd kept Your covenant. They shall teach Jacob Your judgments,And Israel Your law.They shall put incense before You,And a whole burnt sacrifice on Your altar. Bless his substance, Lord,And accept the work of his hands;Strike the loins of those who rise against him,And of those who hate him, that they rise not again.”

"For the hurt of the daughter of my people I am hurt. I am mourning; Astonishment has taken hold of me." Nonetheless, I will not be there to help you when push comes to shove. I have found out our past; I intend to help other Jews who are in situations like ours find out theirs. I have acknowledged what we did to Vilmosz and his side of the family; I cannot help you acknowledge it if you won't acknowledge it. I will not assimilate and pass for a gentile when I am a Jew; you do what you want and be warned that "death shall be chosen rather than life by all the residue of those who remain of this evil family, who remain in all the places where I have driven them,” says the Lord of hosts."

I was born a Jew, a Levite, and a bat-Anusim; and I will die or be Raptured as such. PS You cannot change that I am yours; I am a Fosko; I am a Rusnak; and we are Levites:

By the way, I mean "those among the family who hate me" when I talk about  "they", "you", etc..

The Love Of My Life Versus The Ideal, And Why I Would Prefer the Not-Completely-the-Ideal Love Of My Life

I've obviously been kvetching about the love of my life, and I can tell that I've been utzing some people and wanting to make them brekhn. Nonetheless, I wouldn't talk about my true love if there weren't quite a few factors in play. The factors include that:

1. I'm never going to get my ideal.
2. What I have attracted are guys who are either not right for me and/or don't fit my ideal, anyway; are slimeballs, or both.
3. I've had enough of a rough life as my life has been—for example (going back to Factor Two), I had the first relationship from August 2004 to May 2005 and waited seven (almost eight) years only to end up in the other failed relationship (February 26, 2013-March 2, 2013). Both relationships were with people who turned out to be slimeballs, and both of whom I had eventually to call the police on. Add that I'm already a divorce statistic (My parents are divorced; both of my dad's living siblings are divorced as well [and my dad and my uncle each remarried]; only two of my maternal grandmother's born children have never been divorced; two of my Trudniak great-granduncles were divorced—one was divorced two or three times—; and my mom's maternal granddad's maternal grandmother was divorced—and there were other divorces. There've also been miserable marriages—e.g., that of my dad's paternal grandparents.)—now know that I'm statistically likely to get divorced.
4.  I have Cerebral Palsy with an ITB Pump inside of me, OCD/GAD, MDD, IBS, and ADD. Add in Factor Three, and you have why Factor One is in play whether or not Factor Two is added to it.

So, what is my ideal? Besides what I've already mentioned, here's a list:

1. A Messianic Jew—preferably a Levi or a kohen—and one who knows that we are no longer obligated to keep all 613 mitzvot.
2. A virgin (I'm a virgin; and—yes—that should've been obvious on the fact that I have CP alone.).
3. One who is a political scientist, historian, or similar type of professional.
4. One who can deal with my disabilities, family history, etc. 

I could keep listing more points; but just given  that I have CP and that—e.g.—men have left women who have had more-common conditions such as breast cancer, you should have been able to figure out that I wasn't going to get my ideal. Besides, all the good, I'd-never-be-able-to-get-one-of-them-anyway guys are taken by (mostly) non-disabled women and/or who don't have the kind of family history that I have. I'm well aware of all this to the point that I have cried many times over it (I'm crying right now—and, since Mom's sitting next to me, I'm praying that she doesn't see the tears.). After all, I'm the "gimp" who—by someone's suggestion—should've dated "poor jazz player" Charles Polk (I'm well aware at how the disabled are even viewed by even the good people in society, and the good and bad ones who would never say that kind of stuff out loud.).

So, who is the love of my life? As I said, I'll never tell unless and until the times comes to tell—especially since, e.g., he's already taken. Here's some of what he's like, though (I have to be vague since I don't want to give too much away, since some people know or might be able to figure out who he is.):

1. He cares about tikun ha'olam and social justice, and has done and does avodah l'tikun ha'olam that has affected and affects many people, including people like me.
2. He's Jewish and actually comes from a mixed background like I do.
3. He's handsome.
4. He's an acquaintance of mine.
5. Any woman be blessed to have him, despite his foibles and flaws.
6. He's honest.
7. He knows what he believes and why he believes it.

Do you see now why I talk (albe too much) about him and ask desperately for prayer that I may get him? He may not be my ideal or a perfect diamond, but he's a diamond in the rough who would definitely be worth having—and, given my own history, I'll take what good guy I can (hopefully, G-d willing) get.

In Memory of Staff Sgt. Andrew Louis Rusnak (Andrash HaLevi ben Andrash v'Aviva; USAF-WW2)

I didn't really know Great-Granduncle Andy (z'l), but I know this much:

1. He was humble. Even when he talked about his military service, he tried to make "Andrew Rusnak" and "Mr. Andrew L. Rusnak" look completely different—and they were the same Andrew Rusnak, even though he surely didn't (though he could have) noted "self" as the relationship of the honorer to the honoree. 
2. He loved his parents—he's even being interred at their gravesite.
3. He had that 1900s movie quality in his voice—I wish that I had recorded the call or calls that I made. If you'd wanted to hear a voice from that era, you'd've wanted to hear his.
4. He loved his family.
5. He—and I just figured this out—clearly loved his heritage. He is being cremated and interred at his parents' gravesite—like Tibor (z'l), who directly went through the Holocaust, he felt guilty about surviving (Why else would he want to be cremated when his siblings were all buried? Also, he served on the homefront—and his brothers, Sgt. Carl Stephen Rusnak and S2C Joseph John Rusnak [z'l], served overseas.). Tears came to my eyes when I figured that out—what could he do? As far as I know, he wasn't the one to whom Vilmos and Zoli wrote—Great-Grandma Gaydos (Great-Granduncle Andy's elder sister) had the mitzvah of helping Vilmos, Zoli, et. al. out; and she reneged on her mitzvah (He was single and serving in the Air Force; she was married with four to five children—he was doing what he could; she wasn't.)

I could list more points, but Point Five sticks in particularly with me. Think about this: Every Jew at the time of the Shoah—whether Anusim or openly-Jewish Jews, Messianic or Non Messianic, and inside or outside of Europe—went through the Shoah—whether directly or indirectly. Every Jew who could help fellow Jews had the mitzvah to do so, and Great-Granduncle Andy fulfilled his part of the mitzvah. 

"‘Well done, good and faithful servant; you were faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things. Enter into the joy of your lord.’" and "‘Come, you blessed of My Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world"

Great-Granduncle Andy died of Alzheimer's Disease—and, in a way, thank God that he did; for:

 "The righteous perishes,And no man takes it to heart;Merciful men are taken away,While no one considersThat the righteous is taken away from evil.
He shall enter into peace;They shall rest in their beds,Each one walking in his uprightness."

Would God have been fair to Great-Granduncle Andy to have him be able to comprehend such times? After all, he died on October 2nd—the middle of the week of the government shutdown—, and he'd been battling Alzheimer's Disease for a long time—and what times in which we live, and what times from which God had Great-Granduncle Andy escape!

Alzheimer's Disease was, in a sense, a blessing for a man such as Staff Sgt. Andrew L. Rusnak—a Levi tzedek, a good son, brother, and dad (and if you just know about—let alone at all know—any of his children, you know that); and (indeed) the last of the Fosko Rusnaks (Incidentally, Grandma and I were on the same brainwave—that is, about the mantle passing on to the next generation.).

Staff Sgt. Andrew Louis Rusnak HaLevi ben Andrash v'Aviva, shemo v'zichrono l'bracha (12 Kislev 5677 -25 Tishrei 5773).

From the 1999 Rusnak Family Reunion Cookbook (I should've scanned in the picture better at the time that I did so.).

From one of the Rusnak family reunions. 

From the 1999 Rusnak Family Reunion Cookbook (I should've scanned in the picture better at the time that I did so.). Here is Andrew L. Rusnak with his surviving brothers, Carl and Joseph (of blessed memory)—their oldest sibling, John, died shortly after he was born

From the 1999 Rusnak Family Reunion Cookbook (I should've scanned in the picture better at the time that I did so.). Here is Pvt. Andrew L. Rusnak with his mother (of blessed memory).

From a While Ago, But...

I had read that "Rabbi" Ovadia Yosef is in the hospital and seriously ill, likely to the point of death if his age and condition are considered. In that same article, I read that he had made the remark that Holocaust victims are reincarnated sinners who weren't punished enough the first time. Meanwhile, "Rebbe" Schneerson had made similar comments during his lifetime—that is, he stated that that Anti Zionists were like a gangrene to Israel that needed to be treated.

Clear enemies of their own people (and examples of why Yeshua warns us not to clear clergymen "rabbis"), "Rabbi" Yosef and "Rebbe" Schneerson should have at least reviewed Tanakh. Abilene clearly did, and reached the obvious conclusion: Anti Semitism sometimes just happens! Even though one Messianic community was spared in Bulgaria, Messianic Jews like Sister Edith Stein were not. Even though Zionists escaped the Holocaust, not all Zionists did—and many would have made aliyah if they could have. For example, Vilmosz Rusznak had three children—Yehoshua, Shabbati, and Fredi—with whom he could not just leave Kassa, Hungary—the worst part being, of course, that Mary Rusnak Gaydos (who I still have a hard time forgiving) knew that (and she should have understood—she had four to five young children herself [Tina was born in 1943, and the correspondence had to have begun when Iwan was murdered.]). Anusim weren't spared, either—Jozsef Foczko is an example of this (with his death date unlisted, his burial date in 1941 when then-Czechoslovakian Aranyidka was occupied, and Lo-Anusi relatives in the Lodz ghetto—do I look stupid? And if the correspondence wasn't with the Rusznaks, it was with the Foczkos—again, do I look stupid? And money for what, and from a worse-off country?).

Again, Anti Semitism sometimes just happens—and no Jew is to blame for Anti Semitism that doesn't spare even Messianic, Zionist, and Anusi Jews.

    

Abilene, Texas arrived from google.com on "The Nicole Factor: Holocaust" by searching for holocaust shadrach meshach.

13:02:04 -- 3 minutes ago

I Dedicate This To the Foczkos, Etc. Who Were Never Properly Mourned, And...

That includes those of us who went through becoming Anusim and going through the Shoah (such as little Joszef Foczko of blessed memory). "El Male Rachamim" is a prayer that is recited in memory of the deceased in the Ashkenazi Jewish community. Shlomo Katz HaKohen sang this version.

Physical Therapy, Rome Versus the United States, and Disabled People Like Me

I figured out something, and what I figured out hurts--if it didn't hurt, I'd either be able to not take things so personally (which, according to Patricia Evans, I shouldn't be doing, anyway--that is, I shouldn't just let things roll off of my back or send messages that I can tolerate that kind of thing) or I'd be tolerating that kind of behavior! While I'm not a hero, anyway,  I'm not a hero even among my "friends" (actual or not) and family because they probably don't like strong disabled people who have a chance to stand for something, know what we stand for, and why we stand as we stand.

Deny as they will, they'd like to see me squared away in a convent or asylum (Maybe that's even part of why some don't like Geraldo Rivera). Maybe, as much as to think that they're mad at Geraldo for keeping those like me out of places like Willowbrook hurts, that's it. If I and other disabled people were their stereotypically-controllable, compliant types, they'd like that!

Furthermore, for the ones who are also getting physical therapy, that they don't want their mind working while their bodies are working is not my fault. Besides, part of why Rome lasted longer than the US is lasting is that every forum was one for civic and social engagement--people cared and talked about issues. Granted that they didn't have physical-therapy centers like we do, but they sure had other public-utilized forums--including private businesses--in and at which people would talk with people.

Also, as the old saying goes, the mind gets working (or at least should get working) when the body does. Even further, many people are in physical therapy because they have preventable conditions which they bring on themselves or pre-existing conditions which they exacerbate by not talking. After all, apathy, bottling up of feelings, or whatever else not talking brings about can bring one down. Great-Grandma Czarnecki learned this the hard way, and she finally broke down after 73-93 years (She got married when she was 20 years old, and something at home must have affected her to be attracted to someone as abusive as Great-Granddad ended up being to her.).

Since Great-Grandma Czarnecki broke down and told Aunt Mary, "No, no; it's okay--I want to talk about it!", perhaps my family, "friends", and fellow physical-therapy patients ought to let me talk and start talking themselves--either that, or they can fall down and let whatever else fall right down with them. Besides, they ought to look no further than the once-great-and-now-late Rome and the increasingly-apathetic United States to see how well shutting up, putting on the fake smiles, and leaving everything at the door of the physical-therapy businesses is working.

What I'm Learning from My Social Work 240 Lecture

: Even as I saw said yesterday on Twitter (or do I have to cite that to prove that I'm not a liar? :-P), "intellectual property" is crap. The concept of "intellectual property" says, "F**k you, G-d. We don't care that nothing is new or that everything belongs to you."

"When you're plagiarizing, you're kidnapping someone's ideas," as the lecture states. Yes, you're actually robbing G-d. Again, everything belongs to Him in the end.  Ann Stuart really caused the problems. The Copyright Act of 1708-1710 really caused problems. It basically said, "F**k Solomon." Furthermore, the Copyright Act of 1708-1710 said, "F**k G-d. I don't care that G-d said that nothing is new & everything belongs to Him."

So, as to whether Ann Stuart was a Christian Queen's quite questionable. She didn't trust G-d enough to say, "You'll take care of stealers." Reading for the MLA/APA?Kate Turabian/Ann Stuart zealots, by the way:

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Ecc.%201:9,%20Psalm%2024:1&version=NKJV

(Or is a link not enough? :-P).

But like they care: In this lecture, she talks about "too many direct quotes" and blog sources. So much for nothing new under the sun and that there are still people to trust (and using discernment to figure out who to trust), huh? By the way, if you use this, I'll sue you and your mother's sister's paternal brother's cousin's maternal sister's mother to whom you passed on these ideas for plagiarism :-P (as has been said, so much for the free exchange of ideas, huh?).