My Response To "The Ghosts Of My Grandmothers"

My Response To "The Ghosts Of My Grandmothers"

Perhaps the Malach Hamavet spared Helen Rose in memory of her savtot. As Tanakh states, "the dead know not any thing, neither have they any more a reward", since Savtot Devorah v'Vered are awaiting HaTechiyat HaMetim.

Incidentally, the names Helen, Rose, Mark, and Anna (and variants thereof) are all in my paternal family. An example:

One of my own great-great-grandmothers, Anna Amalia Munková Trudnyaková, either was named for her deceased sister or took her name and claimed her baptism date as her own birthdate at some point*, presumably to honor her. She had daughters named Elizabeth Helen and Anna Margaret, and her parents were Sh'mu'el and Rosalia Korschová Munka.

At least one of her descendants is named Mark, meanwhile; and in full disclosure, one of them is my cousin Mark, whom is sadly deciding to brand himself as the shanda fur die goyim known as "Legit Viva"—for which we clearly did not become Anusim, and part of why (I assume) some of us remain Anusim.

*Anna Amalia Munková Trudnyaková was not baptized. The only baptism record which reconciles any and all dates that she gave as her birthdate is that of her sister. I assume that, by the way, her parents were not risking getting another daughter baptized, since two, Paulina and the first Anna Amalia, had died previously.

Update (September 25, 2016 and Elul 24, 5776), re "Please Stop Telling Me I'm Not 'Really' Jewish" (The context is that some people are being extremely hostile toward the author re any possibility that her daughter may choose to be Catholic.):

If you learn take nothing else from what I say, at least take this away from it: Jews—including Jewish Catholics like Sts. Teresa de Avila and Edith "Teresa Benedicta" Stein (z"l), Aaron "Cardinal Jean-Marie" Lustiger my dad's paternal grandma (a sister of Elizabeth Helen and Anna Margaret)—have believed in a Jewish man named Jesus of Nazareth as the Messiah, and quite a few other Jews agreed to disagree with the Jewish Christians—see, for example, in the New Testament when it talks about Gamaliel: while, despite legends, he did not become a Christian, he tolerated the Jewish Christians of his time. As Gamaliel's granddad said—and as my dad's paternal grandma (z"l) albe-imperfectly lived—"The sum of Torah is this: don't do to others what you don't want them to you. The rest is commentary—go and learn it."

More Depression

"A man's soul sustains him, but who can endure a broken spirit?" I am enduring another Depression flareup, loneliness, etc.—I have even suspended working on the manuscript for my next book.

Spiritbrokeness, unlike my sister's stomach flu, is a kind of sickness that doesn't just go away with prayer, fluids, and rest. Spiritbrokeness takes even more than prayer, sufficient hydration, and enough energy to heal—especially when it exacerbates and feeds off of, e.g., Depression in a vicious feed-be fed cycle.

Megyn Kelly: "Conservative" and "A Lawyer" Mein Tuchus!

For anyone whom's wondering, "meir tuchus" means "my butt!" Anyway, no true conservative (Classical Liberal) and lawyer would state that "legal" inherently means "should be legal":

1. As far as the SCOTUS being the final arbiters of the law, the SCOTUS ruled in favor of inherently-illegal doctrines such as "Ferguson v. Plessy" and, before that, "Sanford v. Scott". The former was not overturned until 1955 (when "Brown" was fully cleared for implementation), and "Scott" en de facto was never overturned until Jim Crow ended, despite that the end of the Civil War ended it en de jure. 
2. DOMA was in force from the Clinton Administration until just relatively recently in the Obama Administration. 
3. Legalizing same-sex marriage risks religious freedom within certain contexts. For example, why should an Orthodox rabbi be sued by a couple whom he refuses to marry when he believes that the Flood came because of same-sex marriage in part (which the Talmud does state)?

By the way, speaking of rabbis, one'd think that Orthodox rabbis such as Chief Rabbi Binyomin Jacobs would be helpful during this time of Anti-Jewish and Anti-Christian intolerance—although he's not at all tolerant of either Jewish Christians or gentile ones, or any Orthodox Jew whom even tolerates Christians (despite how Christianity as Noahidism is viewed).

Re Rabbi Binyomin Jacobs' Intolerance of Tolerance Of Christianity

Does the rabbi know history and his own halakhah? To most talmidim b'halakhah harabanim, "To Do the Will of Our Father in Heaven" is a perfectly-fine statement—after all, Christianity is not considered avodah zarah for goyim, and is in fact considered a legitimate form of Noahidism.

As far as for Jewish Christians like myself, we should be fine if we don't proselytize; and we're still Jews "even if [we, as rabbis like Rabbi Jacobs assume that we,] sin"—and as Ya'akov and Lavan stated regarding their own case, יהוה will judge between us and those like this rabbi. Even Gamali'el—despite the bubbe meise that he became a Christian—was tolerant of Christians and figured that we'd eventually "come to nothing" if יהוה wasn't willed of God in some way.

Second visit to Shelby

Second visit to Shelby

Part Of What's Exacerbated My Depression Of Late, And A Prayer Request

A few months ago, a family friend to whom I had not talked in a while reached out to me. Once he began to talking to me again, and after four to five years had passed, I began viewing him as a father figure, a writing mentor, and a friend whom is more dear to me than he'll ever know—"There are friends that one hath to his own hurt; but there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother."

Needlessly to say, he became "a friend that sticketh closer than a brother". Then one day, he suddenly stopped talking to me. The only explanation was this, and it came quite a bit of time later—and remember that he is, or at least was, a writing mentor: "Going through a difficult time. Keep writing."

After that, a major news story broke; and I asked him if one of the parties whom was involved in the news-making situation was associated with him—and I received no response to that inquiry. In the next day and the following days, I was left to guess whether the news story had to do with him in even any remote way (e.g., if one of his family or friends of friend was involved), other news stories involved him, or anything else had happened. After all, what did (and does) "a difficult time" mean?

This family friend, father figure, writing mentor, and closer-than-a-brother friend of my own had reached out to me in the first place, and he ditched me without explanation. Given, among other factors, my C.P. and mental illnesses, his ditching of me was absolutely the last thing that I needed—or at least wanted, since only God ultimately knows why I needed it. I've also needed other ditchings as well, by the way, and only God has also known why I needed those—and one more-recent one came from an in-law cousin, might I add.

"The spirit of a man will sustain his infirmity; but a broken spirit who can bear?" That kind of broken spirit is what I've endured once again in the past few months—and as if OCD/Anxiety. Depression, ADD, and IBS weren't enough in of themselves; and only God ultimately knows why He's exacerbated them.

"I am the LORD, and there is none else, beside Me there is no God; I have girded thee, though thou hast not known Me; That they may know from the rising of the sun, and from the west, that there is none beside Me; I am the LORD; and there is none else; I form the light, and create darkness; I make peace, and create evil; I am the LORD, that doeth all these things.

"Drop down, ye heavens, from above, and let the skies pour down righteousness; let the earth open, that they may bring forth salvation, and let her cause righteousness to spring up together; I the LORD have created it. Woe unto him that striveth with his Maker, as a potsherd with the potsherds of the earth! Shall the clay say to him that fashioned it: 'What makest thou?' Or: 'Thy work, it hath no hands'? Woe unto him that saith unto his father: 'Wherefore begettest thou?' Or to a woman: 'Wherefore travailest thou?' Thus saith the LORD, the Holy One of Israel, and his Maker: Ask Me of the things that are to come; concerning My sons, and concerning the work of My hands, command ye Me. I, even I, have made the earth, and created man upon it; I, even My hands, have stretched out the heavens, and all their host have I commanded."

I know, too, that God's ways are not our ways, as Isaiah also speaks by the Holy Spirit. So, for example and as bad as this sounds, I don't know whether God reminds me of my friend on a daily basis to remind me to pray for him or to allow HaSatan to make fun of me (as He allowed HaSatan to torment and persecute Job, whom was already suffering with the question of whether his children loved God: "'It may be that my sons have sinned, and blasphemed God in their hearts.'")

It could also be—and this is where the "as bad as this sounds" comes into play—that God's making fun of me or punishing me for some reason that only He ultimately knows: "Search me, O God, and know my heart, try me, and know my thoughts; And see if there be any way in me that is grievous, and lead me in the way everlasting." Having my guesses about hurtful situations, what I've done or not done, etc. hurts; and even if I know and the person whom I've wronged or whom's wronging me won't tell me, that really hurts.

Incidentally (as the year went from 2015 to 2016), I saw another reminder of him, since I discussed genealogy with him and wondered if a name in his own family wasn't an allusion to this verse: "The name of the LORD is a strong tower: the righteous runneth into it, and is set up on high."

Please pray for me, pray for my friend, and pray for others whom need prayers on their behalf, meanwhile—may we all call on HaShem Yehovah, HaMigdal HaChazaq; and may Yehovah bring reconciliation or whatever is needed to be brought between me and my friend (אם ירצה, יהוה.), and may our friendship be almost as strong as Yehovah Himself.

Guess Who I Got To Meet?

This is Camille's maternal sister Shelby! Born October 20th to Tootsie and Booby, Shelby came home with her family yesterday. She is adjusting well and will, God willing, get to meet her sister and her cousin Reilly soon.