Where Do I Begin Regarding These Past 10 Days? Well...

Just bear with me. I went into ITB surgery on the 17th of July (and still owe my friend a tallit or weaved tzitziyot--and there was no way that, regardless of what I wanted, I could take up weaving in the hospital). The actually installation of the ITB pump was on the 18th (since they did a trial run with ITB on the 17th), and the next few days were Hell in at least some ways (Some people actually gave a ****--or at least more of a **** than they normally would about me--, so that didn't make it complete Hell.). I then got transferred to Mt. Washington Pediatric Hospital from Johns Hopkins on the 22nd of July, and I've been at MWPH since.

As my aunt put my situation, I've had a lot of time to reflect--and, as usual and of course, some of my reflecting has gotten Mom mad at me. That's why I now have two Facebook accounts--one for my private life, and one for the life that Mom doesn't like. The life that she doesn't like, of course, is my life as a commentator, blogger, and other kind of pundit, kvetcher, or whatever I am. She hates that, for example, I talk about subjects that aren't "lighter subjects" when people come to visit me. 

Further, my second account was just originally a backup account to which someone sent me a bizarre friend request. So, everything seemed to come together as a "perfect storm"--I needed (and need) to keep my Mom and others out of my punditry and the fray thereof (for all of our sakes), I am a quasi-public figure (for both good and bad, with fame and infamy) that needs to start separating my public and private domains at some point, anyway; and I frankly don't want my family telling me what I can and cannot talk about--especially much of my life is driven by that (as I've often copied and pasted--or at least referred to) "nothing is secret that will not be revealed, nor anything hidden that will not be known and come to light."

My life is driven by being informed and informing others about what I know. After all, "Tzedek, tzedek tirdof--Justice, justice, you shall pursue." That's why I talk about our scattered, broken, and at-least-somewhat-corrupt family--for example, my family (e.g., Mary Rusnak Gaydos) was responsible for the murder of at least six Holocaust victims (Vilmosz, "Dudus", Pepi, Zoli, Miklos, and Sandor)--and they're only the ones that I could surely name off hand. My family also helped bring down Richard Nixon (Remember that Pop-Pop was IRS Agent John "Jack" Czarnecki and was the same Jack Czarnecki who served tax papers to Nixon via his attorneys.)--and the catch was that Nixon was a virulent Anti Semite who hated Jewish Democrats, and none other than a self-loathing Jewish Democrat was used to bring him down.

And what was the boring and mundane story that I got offhand? Oh, the Foskos wrote to Mary Gaydos asking for money, and she sent food (and during the Depression when the U.S. was hit harder than Czechoslovakia and Hungary--which alone should've alerted me to the fact that was a hole in the story), and that Pop-Pop was involved with Watergate (and, later, served papers to Nixon). 

I had no idea that my great-grandmother was a rotten kapo. By the way, you can get offended all that you want; but to deny relatives who are desperate and breaking their rules about not writing to "meshuadim" is a chillul-Yehovah (and given that Great-Grandma Gaydos professed to be a Christian, a chillul-Yeshua); and she deserves that get called for the kapo that she was--even though she's dead and has been dead since 1992. Besides, she wasn't called out for years; some in the family still defend her; Yehoshua's side understandably stopped talking to us for good again after that, and we're still cursed--"‘The Lord is longsuffering and abundant in mercy, forgiving iniquity and transgression; but He by no means clears the guilty, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children to the third andfourth generation.’" By the way, in case you didn't get the memo by now, I'm of the fourth generation if you count Mary Gaydos as of the first, of the third if you count Grandma as of the first--and my children and the other (as much as Jack and Joan hate it) children of Jack's and Joan's grandchildren, and the children of my second cousins (their great-grandnephews and great-grandnieces) are set to be doomed because of the promised (not idly threatened--promised!) curse that Great-Grandma Gaydos set upon the family.

Also, given that the family continues to cover up for Great-Grandma Gaydos, we're repeating her chillul-Yehovah. So, what are we going to do with the family who made aliyah? Are we going to repeat Great-Grandma Gaydos' sin against Vilmosz and sin against them when push comes to shove with Iran? Are we going to say, "We can't help you" again--and, also again, wreck our testimony (and testimonies) regarding Yeshua while we're at it? I don't know about them, but I'm even making aliyah if and when I can--if they're part of the "the residue of those who remain of this evil family, who remain in all the places where [Yehovah has] driven [us]", that's not my problem.

As far as Pop-Pop, as I've said, none other than a self-loathing Jewish Democrat was used to bring Nixon down. Again, none other than a self-loathing Jewish Democrat was used to bring him down. "[S]elf-loathing"! For what? He let the Anti Semites who tried to bring his grandparents down bring him down. What the heck is the matter with a Jew who brought an Anti Semite down and won't say, "Yeah, G-d used me to bring that S.O.B. down?" Are you that afraid of your heritage, Pop-Pop?

"Has a nation changed its gods, Which are not gods? But My people have changed their Glory Forwhat does not profit." Here was an opportunity for the son of pogrom and other Anti-Semitism survivors to say, "Yes, I am a Jew, a proud Jew; and G-d has used me to bring down one who went against His people"--and he squandered the opportunity. What a shame, especially when the glory should've gone to G-d! "For as the sash clings to the waist of a man, so I have caused the whole house of Israel and the whole house of Judah to cling to Me,’ says the Lord, ‘that they may become My people, for renown, for praise, and for glory; but they would not hear.’"

Pretending to be a gentile, Polish-Lithuanian-American Catholic is worth the holding back of glory to G-d and a voice for the Jewish people?! "Do not abhor us, for Your name’s sake; Do not disgrace the throne of Your glory. Remember, do not break Your covenant with us." Continuous Anti Semitism in return for standing up for and helping my people is worth far more than Crypto Jewishness and assimilation that will not help one in the end. 

Thus, there are just two examples right there--and two examples that I never want to see a repeat of or parallel to in my family or any family ever again. Of course, as I've said, Mom doesn't like when I talk about all this. Well (and thanks to Christians United For Israel for using this verse as their mission statement), "For Zion’s sake I will not hold My peace, And for Jerusalem’ssake I will not rest, Until her righteousness goes forth as brightness, And her salvation as a lamp that burns."

Pursuing justice, therefore, begins with pursuing justice for my people and within my family--and that includes talking about my family history and other subjects which are to my mom's chagrin for me to talk about. Also, again, that's why one Facebook account for my private life, and one for my life as a commentator, blogger, and other kind of pundit, kvetcher, or whatever I am. After all, as aforestated, I want to keep my family (including my mom) out of the ever-increasing fray of my pursuits of justice and tikun-ha'olam. 

I Actually Didn't Want To Think That Felix Mendelssohn Was A Believing Jew, But...

Alright; alright. I'll believe that Mendelssohn was a believing Jew. But I did read that he resisted "Mendelssohn" being used for "Hark! The Herald Angels Sing". I did read that he expressly resisted it being used for religious purposes and that he may have resisted Christianity in secret. Then again, to say that a lot of believing Jews like myself have had problems with the rest of the Church over the years is fair. I guess that I just wanted to be careful & err on the side of that Mendelssohn was a Non-Messianic Crypto Jew so that I wasn't disappointed.

To know that Mendelssohn was a believing Jew (which Wikipedia of all places surprisingly states) is good. At least I know that I won't be disappointed and that I will meet Mendelssohn in Heaven after all. Coming from an Anusi background, I weirdly don't want to get my hopes up and think that certain Jews were fellow believers if they weren't. I also don't want to err toward and mislead Non Messianics when giving examples of Jews who actually believed. I can safely give Mendelssohn now, so that helps. I guess that I believed what revisionisms tried to imply that he didn't believe.

Too often is the case that (and a contention that I have is that) the Church tends to engage in revisionism as much as non believers. For example, we like to preach that the US was a Christian country. If we're honest, we'll say that it was sadly Desitic Unitarian. We also talk about the Crusades as this great Christian conquest when they were nothing more than Pseudo-Christian, Anti-Semitic pogroms. I get that were in Laodicea, but that doesn't mean that we can fall away like everyone else. We as the Church have to be honest.

Besides, does being dishonest help Non-Believing Jews?

Two Problems...

1. I wasn't making reading Scripture a priority in the recently-better times. Thus was fulfilled, "When you have eaten and are full, then you shall bless the Lord your God for the good land which He has given you." (Deuteronomy 8:10) and "When I have brought them to the land flowing with milk and honey, of which I swore to their fathers, and they have eaten and filled themselves and grown fat, then they will turn to other gods and serve them; and they will provoke Me and break My covenant." (Deuteronomy 31:20) You can see in the Book of Jeremiah, too, how I was handed over to my persecutors because I did not make reading Scripture in better times a priority.
2. I have 140 followers and 517 friends on my regular page, 201 subscribers on YouTube, 469 Twitter followers, plenty of Blogger readers, etc. (if one doesn't account for duplicates). Yet, this isn't translating into "Likes" on my public page. Thus, I have a really-shaky support network and a don't-know-what-to-do conundrum in the more-private sphere. I can't accept every friend request in the world, yet I can't get enough "Likes" (headscratcher).

Problem #1 I'm working on fixing. Problems 2a and 2b are harder to fix without your help.

Secret's Out, Folks ;-) ...

I have C.P.! Herp a derp!


In all seriousness, that I have C.P. has been known forever! I also have OCD/GAD, MDD, ADD, and IBS!

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Let's See...

1. I observed my Blog Shabbat for this week yesterday.
2. I'm changing my Blogger habits--sort of. For certain people (at least those who I'm friendly and/or reconciled with), I won't say and do certain things. As for the people that I don't like, I'm just not giving you the time of day and I'm letting you fall into your own trap unless I absolutely have to expose you--e.g., Toby Keith, Tiki Barber and Traci Lynn Johnson Barber. As for Toby Keith--as I've blogged before--, the man had gallbladder surgery and now has time to think and reflect--so, I wish the man well and hopes that he uses his time out to get his priorities in order. As for Tiki and Traci Lynn Johnson Barber; they're now married and the ones who are going to have to deal with what they've done if and when their marriage goes the way that Tiki Barber's first marriage did. As for who they're friends with and who's friends with them, I can do nothing about that. Besides, I have people in my own life for whom some people would like at me like I'm Tiki or Traci Johnson Barber.
3. I'm given up on holding family, friends, etc. accountable in real life as well--not that I'm perfect, but you'll fall into whatever traps of your own that you've set up. As I did say in the open letter and the follow up (which few to none bothered to read), though (and both of which I ended up removing partly because so few people read the follow up); you can forget me sharing family pictures--after all, if I have to ask you to post an image while you're posting the same kinds of images (e.g., of yourself and of others who you've asked me not to post pictures of, all while you're posting pictures of yourself and even of them), you can perhaps even forget my taking of pictures of you. I'm not playing your hypocritical games anymore, and you'll miss of a heck of a lot of memories. By the way, this isn't everyone in the family--this is only those few with (so to speak) sticks up their butt about what I do and have a "G-d forbid that you do it, but I can do whatever I want" attitude. To the ones who aren't hypocritical and don't mind picture taking and sharing, you'll always be allowed to see my photos.  
4. For some reason, my Google Chrome broswer and Wireless Mouse are going AWOL, and my Internet Explorer can be a bit slow.

I could go on, but few to none of you will probably give a darn.

What Constitutes "Lies R Us" And Other Personal Attacks?

With all due respect to Bill O'Reilly, one can't say that--for example--that part of "Lies R Us" includes calling out my family, asking the legitimate questions about Toby Keith and exposing Cathy Dallwig (the so-called "Caring Director"), Mike Khandjian (the "pastor" who called the Aron HaB'rit a "holy piece of furniture") and the rest of Chapelgate Presbyterian Church, even though I vowed never to talk about them again, though they remain as-yet unapologetic examples.

By the way, I have never received an apology once. I did, however, during that contentious time, receive a lawsuit threat from Steve Dallwig--sorry, bud; but your wife's a public figure within a known religious institution, and--as far as I know--I was generous not to mention or even much remember your catty lawsuit threat until now. Also, the people who are making people run in droves from the Church nowadays and into, say, Buddhism and Atheism are people like you and your "Caring Director" wife--who is supposed to reach out to people like me when we go AWOL from church, because (for example) our disabilities leave us  from being able to ride to church (which, thank G-d, mine did) or even crippled in corners within our own houses and dead (and what a shame having a dead body of a church, now-ex, church member would've been if the case were that I wasn't coming to church because I was dead and nobody from Chapelgate--e.g., the "Caring Director"--called my house or e-mailed to ask if I was okay). By the way, I give credit to one church member for reaching out to me during that time (the aspects of which still crawl under my skin from time and time), and that church member certainly isn't among the Dallwigs.

Therefore--as I said--,with all due respect to Bill O'Reilly and using the Dallwigs as examples, I am (and others aren't) engaging in "Lies R Us", "personal attacks", and "smearing"--I am (and others are) following the advice to "Call it like you see it"; especially when "it" concerns even apparently-low-level, supposedly-private-citizen figures like the Dallwigs who are an example of Laodicea. 

By the way, I'm like an elephant: I never forget. I forgive; I don't begrudge; but I never forget, and I warn others when they need to be warned and use examples when they need to be used. Also, I'm happy at my new church home; as I said, I just warn others when they need to be warned because I don't want to them to fall into the pitfall and hole that I was in for years--and I'm still waiting for the necessary apologies:

1. From "Pastor" Mike Khandjian for demeaning and degrading what he (if he paid attention in seminary at all) knows that we also call Ha'Aron-HaKodesh--the Holy Ark, not "a holy piece of furniture" that one can use and/or abuse anytime that he or she likes. I'm waiting for an apology to me and my people--many of whom won't turn to Jesus because foolish "pastors" degrade the very Aron-HaKodesh that held a representation of Yeshua--in fact, part of Yeshua in written form (since the Ten Commandments are part of the Word of G-d, who became flesh).
2. From the Dallwigs. As I said, "I don't begrude; but I never forget, and I warn others when they need to be warned and use examples when they need to be used." Because of catty, fraudulent, unBiblical lawsuit threats and not being an actual "Caring Director", the Dallwigs get used as examples of why Chapelgate is part of Laodicea. 

You Get To See More Pictures, Etc. Only If...

You "like" my page on Facebook and subscribe to my channel on YouTube:

I Have No Problem Blogging About People Except When I've Promised Not To...

Public figures, even if they're "private citizens", are automatic blog subjects. Whether former or present public figures; whether in institutions (such as churches, schools, town halls), the media, or elsewhere, they're getting blogged about if need be. If a private citizen were no-name Joe Schmo or Jane Schmane, then he or she would be most likely or almost-entirely (if not entirely) left alone. For example, a family member of a public figure is off limits unless he or she has made him or her self a public figure in any way, shape, or form.

This means that, for example,   the Huntsman daughters and Meghan McCain, both having made themselves public figures and socialites, are certainly not off limits.. So far, I've seen nothing with the Huntsman daughters or Meghan McCain that merits blog-worthy and expose criticism. I don't always agree with or condone them, but they've done nothing that I see as blog worthy-- although I must say that I agree with the point made by some astute Huffington Post readers that Meghan McCain probably criticized Callista Bisek Gingrich because she knows what having a mother who did some of the same as Mrs. Gingrich is like. 

I did note, however, “John McCain was also ailing. He was a POW come back from Vietnam and had a wife who refused to be there for her husband and let him be there for her in her pain. I speak as a disabled person who'd give to even share in someone's pain with him.” I also noted, "John McCain's now-ex wife could not honestly appreciate her husband coming back from being a POW. She had to find a reason to bitter. Newt, on the other hand, had no understand

­able reason. At least McCain also genuinely repented. I can't, being born disabled, even get anyone to share in my pain; and McCain would've put his POW ailments aside or into helping Carol McCain had she not been so bitter and refusing to share in pain."

I think that Meghan McCain gets how her dad was slighted by the then-Mrs. Carol McCain. As I said re Meghan McCain, "I've seen nothing with the Huntsman daughters or Meghan McCain that merits blog-worthy and expose criticism;" though this case for Meghan McCain-- because of Huffington Post readers merits a positive critique of Meghan McCain and how understanding and wise she is when the situation regards adultery and hypocrisy. 

In conclusion, you see how I was willing to talk about Meghan McCain, as well as even church- and school-based (among other institutional) public figures. Small- and big-time public figures be aware-- if you need to get blogged about, for good or bad, you're getting blogged about. The only exception is if I've promised not to talk about you for whatever reason.