“I don’t care what name you use, and I don’t need an explanation about your other name. Just take a number, and have a seat.”
Having previously had a family tree made by an intimidator did not help, and having seen correspondence published by one archivist (and a possible relative at that) on Facebook also did not help. Getting to this archive, then, maybe also did not help.
Damned if she did, and damned if she did not—not finding a way to this archive, then, also did not help. Over 15 overall-wasted years did not help, despite what information and help Dafna had finding it came about for her. She could not commit suicide, though, even notwithstanding that doing so would help her go to the Source of all information (Yehovah Himself). She also could not continue to live being in her way and apparently everyone else’s way, and she yet could not give Hamas a victory by committing suicide—even though she would be away from Hamas and everyone else whom hated her, and she would (if suicide did not send her permanently to Gehenna) be with Yehovah (and the indignity of being forever consigned to the same place as Antisemites would be too much to bear—especially because Antisemitism caused her suicidal ideation to flare up).
Damned if she did, and damned if she did not.
“*Loud chime.* C122007, sign in to the archives. C122007, sign in to the archives. “*Loud chime.* C122007, sign in to the archives. C122007, sign in to the archives.”
Damned if she did, and damned if she did not. Dafna signed in to the archives—and whether “C122007, sign in to the archives” was yet another sign of ultimate failure was up to Yehovah.
“Name: Dafna Maratovah Zernetzky—alias ‘Dafne Rochle’. Number: C122007. ✔️I agree to the laws, rules, and regulations as pertain to this archival building and the archival information held therein (See ‘Laws, Rules, and Regulations Pertaining To This Archive’) on the next page.
“Signature in English and Hebrew or Yiddish (Print signature valid, although cursive preferred): Dafna Zernetzky; דפנה צרנצכי. Date (English and Hebrew—do not use the Karaite date unless you have received an exemption from using the Hebrew date): 25 Tishri 5784.”
Dafna knew that the real Hebrew (“Karaite”) date was 24 Tishri 5783—and at this rate, days and dates did not make a difference to her except for the fact that Yehovah gave the mitzvah to begin the year in Aviv-Nisan. The day on which Yehovah would give her success without failure (that is, long-term success that would not ultimately turn into failure) would be the first day in a long time that made a difference to her.