On Missing Someone

Actually. I miss quite a few people—even ones whom hate me and/or couldn't be gladder that I'm out of their lives for whatever reason, and the reason is that they usually cut me off (whether rightly or wrongly) for whatever reasons. I've written about some of these people before, by the way; and I've even yet to write about some of them.

Some of the people whom I miss, for example:

1. Diane Magruder, whom my sister and I called "Ms. Diane": Ms. Diane was actually the one whom referred us to Reilly's breeder when I was talking about getting a puppy—and she got to meet Reilly before she died. She didn't get to meet Cam, though, although we know that she'll get to meet Cam and see Reilly again one day—and I was thinking about her when I visited Cam's sister Shelby and Shelby's family today, and they talked about how they referred someone to Joyce (Reilly's, Cam's, and Shelby's breeder). When I mentioned how Ms. Diane referred us to Joyce (and how Joyce and other good breeders get a bad name because of pseudo-breeder puppy millers), I also mentioned how Ms. Diane met Reilly on the final day that we saw her—and thought about how she was markedly different after her brother died, which she mentioned, and as ALS took her life, about which we didn't know until we got the call one day from another one of her friends—she wanted to spare us, I suppose, of knowing that she was in the throes of ALS and dying from it.
2. Many family members, quite a few whom I too often took for granted. To be fair, I'm still dealing with a lot of my own issues (and some of the family members had their own issues, as well as common issues, in regards to other family members); and there were other factors which contributed to hardly being able to see them, etc.. Still, I never even got to see sides of them that others had known or ask them questions that I could've and should've asked when I had the chance.
3. Quite a few family friends, including to whom I'd send my writings—including the writings which went into "The Real Stories", and stories about Reilly. While I send pictures of Reilly to two of the friends and I used to be able to send pictures of Reilly to the one friend (the dear friend, father figure, and writing mentor to whom I a biography of Reilly which I wrote for writing practice), having sent them pictures of Reilly as well as e-mailing my writings to them is not the same as being able to talk to them face to face. Besides, only one of them has ever met Reilly, and Reilly has yet to meet any of their furbabies (one of whom is an elder of Reilly, a Golden Retriever named Angel).

As far as I know, by the way, Reilly does and would love them all—as she's certainly loved the ones whom she's met, even though she won't see some of them again until the World To Come comes.

One of the stories that I sent regards when Reilly escaped to see Leo (which happened shortly before the first anniversary of her homecoming). 

Some Examples Of Effects Of When Losses Of Relationships, Whether In Life Or Due To Death, Still Affect Someone After A Long Time

The reason that I write this entry, by the way, is because I'm thinking about—among other relationships that I've lost—a relationship with a dear friend and a writing mentor that I've lost—and one effect of that is that I can't finish the manuscript of the next book on which I'm working*. Losses of relationships like that can be paralyzing, and it's paralyzing in this case because he or she was one of the three friends whom inspired me to even write the book.

As far as other examples of effects because of other relationships which I've lost, and examples to which I'm sure others can relate:

1. Death of family members does indeed bring about the inability to know about and discover parts of yourself and your history. For example, I never got to know the Jewish Mary Trudnak Czarnecki (z"l) about whom I might've had a clue had I thought about staying in touch with her (e.g., That story that she told Mom about spitting on a neighbor's line-drying sheets would've been fully understood before had I know that she's an Ashkenazi Jew whom had the misfortune of living next to her shanda-fur-die-goyim in-law brother Susi, whom Granduncle Tony [z"l] called "an SOB" for understandable reasons. To spit re someone or something horrid is a minhag Ashkenazi, as I later learned, by the way.)
2. Per the example above, I also never knew that she died under horrible circumstances, and only after I reconnected with another relative find and figure out how horrid they were. Great-Grandma, I think, passed down much of my Yiddishkeit to me, whether she knew or didn't know that she did, by the way.
3. Even losses of toxic relationships and/or other relationships whose endings are not your fault can bring bad effects, such as apprehension about your reputation and the effects thereof. For instance, being stalked on even LinkedIn by the sister of my sister's ex boyfriend was not at all fun—that caused an exacerbation in my Depression which carried over into the first year of Reilly's being home. Also, I still wonder what lies the ex boyfriend's family are telling about me and who those lies have reached—for all I know, I could come into contact with an HR manager whom has been told that I'm a crazy troublemaker by the family, and he or she doesn't know that (for instance) the now-ex boyfriend was "reenacting" as a Nazi ("German soldier") and has some very-Anti-Semitic friends (one of whom directed a "Heil ******, b****" slur at me when I confronted him.).
4. Losses of relationships due or at least partly due to mistakes that you've made can have the same and/or similar effects as the losses of relationships for which you had and have no fault. I'm still dealing with, for instance, bringing up that another cousin's hospitalization is due partly to our assimilation—I should've known, e.g., that a certain family member would ignore that Ashkenazi Jewish systems are not designed to digest and process what treif food we've picked up eating over the years; and I should've known that this same family member would defend "Grandma" (to me, Great-Grandma) Gaydos re Vilmosz (z"l v'HY"D).

I could give more examples of relationship-loss types and effects thereof, though I've written enough to get my point across to you. Besides, writing all of this has a bad side, which includes distress from bad memories and a distress-affected IBS flareup.

*By the way, the first book can be looked at, at Amazon and MoreBooks.De. I've made nothing from them yet and don't want to do so until I'm sure that, e.g., I can pay my student loans off and have a secure future—being a living-at-home, single, disabled, and 26-year-old two-time-ex-girlfriend (with each ex boyfriend being men with whom I had to break up and on whom I had to call the police) sucks—nothing about, e.g., being almost $25K in student debt and a person with C.P. and comorbid conditions (including Depression) is glamorous. 

Part Of What's Exacerbated My Depression Of Late, And A Prayer Request

A few months ago, a family friend to whom I had not talked in a while reached out to me. Once he began to talking to me again, and after four to five years had passed, I began viewing him as a father figure, a writing mentor, and a friend whom is more dear to me than he'll ever know—"There are friends that one hath to his own hurt; but there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother."

Needlessly to say, he became "a friend that sticketh closer than a brother". Then one day, he suddenly stopped talking to me. The only explanation was this, and it came quite a bit of time later—and remember that he is, or at least was, a writing mentor: "Going through a difficult time. Keep writing."

After that, a major news story broke; and I asked him if one of the parties whom was involved in the news-making situation was associated with him—and I received no response to that inquiry. In the next day and the following days, I was left to guess whether the news story had to do with him in even any remote way (e.g., if one of his family or friends of friend was involved), other news stories involved him, or anything else had happened. After all, what did (and does) "a difficult time" mean?

This family friend, father figure, writing mentor, and closer-than-a-brother friend of my own had reached out to me in the first place, and he ditched me without explanation. Given, among other factors, my C.P. and mental illnesses, his ditching of me was absolutely the last thing that I needed—or at least wanted, since only God ultimately knows why I needed it. I've also needed other ditchings as well, by the way, and only God has also known why I needed those—and one more-recent one came from an in-law cousin, might I add.

"The spirit of a man will sustain his infirmity; but a broken spirit who can bear?" That kind of broken spirit is what I've endured once again in the past few months—and as if OCD/Anxiety. Depression, ADD, and IBS weren't enough in of themselves; and only God ultimately knows why He's exacerbated them.

"I am the LORD, and there is none else, beside Me there is no God; I have girded thee, though thou hast not known Me; That they may know from the rising of the sun, and from the west, that there is none beside Me; I am the LORD; and there is none else; I form the light, and create darkness; I make peace, and create evil; I am the LORD, that doeth all these things.

"Drop down, ye heavens, from above, and let the skies pour down righteousness; let the earth open, that they may bring forth salvation, and let her cause righteousness to spring up together; I the LORD have created it. Woe unto him that striveth with his Maker, as a potsherd with the potsherds of the earth! Shall the clay say to him that fashioned it: 'What makest thou?' Or: 'Thy work, it hath no hands'? Woe unto him that saith unto his father: 'Wherefore begettest thou?' Or to a woman: 'Wherefore travailest thou?' Thus saith the LORD, the Holy One of Israel, and his Maker: Ask Me of the things that are to come; concerning My sons, and concerning the work of My hands, command ye Me. I, even I, have made the earth, and created man upon it; I, even My hands, have stretched out the heavens, and all their host have I commanded."

I know, too, that God's ways are not our ways, as Isaiah also speaks by the Holy Spirit. So, for example and as bad as this sounds, I don't know whether God reminds me of my friend on a daily basis to remind me to pray for him or to allow HaSatan to make fun of me (as He allowed HaSatan to torment and persecute Job, whom was already suffering with the question of whether his children loved God: "'It may be that my sons have sinned, and blasphemed God in their hearts.'")

It could also be—and this is where the "as bad as this sounds" comes into play—that God's making fun of me or punishing me for some reason that only He ultimately knows: "Search me, O God, and know my heart, try me, and know my thoughts; And see if there be any way in me that is grievous, and lead me in the way everlasting." Having my guesses about hurtful situations, what I've done or not done, etc. hurts; and even if I know and the person whom I've wronged or whom's wronging me won't tell me, that really hurts.

Incidentally (as the year went from 2015 to 2016), I saw another reminder of him, since I discussed genealogy with him and wondered if a name in his own family wasn't an allusion to this verse: "The name of the LORD is a strong tower: the righteous runneth into it, and is set up on high."

Please pray for me, pray for my friend, and pray for others whom need prayers on their behalf, meanwhile—may we all call on HaShem Yehovah, HaMigdal HaChazaq; and may Yehovah bring reconciliation or whatever is needed to be brought between me and my friend (אם ירצה, יהוה.), and may our friendship be almost as strong as Yehovah Himself.

My Closing Thought For the Night, And.....

I'm definitely thinking about certain people with this one—I could name names, too, though I'm hopefully too nice to do that. If you're worried that you're one of those people, you're most likely not one of those people; and if you're one of those people whom's blaming me re people whom've ditched me (despite that I'm imperfect and as human as anyone else), you're most likely one of those people—and of course you're, I'm guessing, not worried since you're blaming me.

I'm sure, by the way, that others with, e.g., mental illnesses and physical disabilities are thinking the same thought about certain people whom were (or maybe even still are) in their lives that I'm thinking about whom were and still are in my life—e.g., certain family members who've ditched me and would like to think that I'm eradicated from existence, let alone our common families' bloodlines, just because they've ditched; or they'd even like to affect people to think of me as different from whom I really am, and they do this by basically slandering and libeling me,

I made this with Powerpoint 2013, by the way.

Happy Mother's Day...

Powerpoint® 2013 and even Bing™ Clipart are good tools, by the way. 

A Sobering Reality That I've Have Relearned This Week

If you don't stick with someone in his or her bad times, you don't deserve to share in his or her good times. I'm not saying that I haven't been that undeserving person at times. Nonetheless, any person who won't stick with another in his or her bad times doesn't deserve to share in his or her good times. Also, especially those who don't have as many and/or heavy burdens to bear should be helping those who does who do have many and/or heavy-enough burdens to bear.

To think about walking away from people who walk away from me is sobering, and I have to walk away from a person to whom I am somehow a burden. Right now, I'm even thinking of the horror that my aunt told me about in regards to my Granduncle Tony when he snapped at Great-Grandma: "You're a burden!" That she was a burden wasn't the case: that Pop-Pop and others were burdens because they would not help Granduncle Tony help Great-Grandma was the case.

That's probably part of what killed Granduncle Tony (z"l), too: he was the only good son who could really help Great-Grandma (z"l), and few stepped up to help him help her. After all, the two other good sons were unable to help: Granduncle Francis ("Red") had been deceased since 1985 (and he had his own issues during his lifetime), and Granduncle Jim has had to devote a significant amount of his time to Jamie (or who else could and would? Then again, Jamie could've been in a Willowbrook. He wasn't, since Granduncle Jim and Grandaunt Annie didn't let Jamie's accidental overdose on codeine come between them and Jamie. After all, they understood that Grandaunt Annie's sister and the doctors tried to do their best when then-1.5-years-old Jamie was having seizures when his aunt was babysitting him. They, by the way, are an example of those who are bearing burdens—not Jamie himself, mind you, since Jamie is not a burden—they could've even sued or filed criminal charges against Jamie's aunt, and they decided to take the position that life happens and that those who tried to help Jamie had no idea that the codeine to which he is allergic would not help him.).

Being one of the few, if not the only one, who is bearing a burden can take a toll on the bearer in question—which is my point about part of what killed Granduncle Tony. Even as far back as 1964, he was the only one to help Great-Grandma—Pop-Pop was living in Glen Burnie with his wife and three children (one of whom was to be born in August 1965); Granduncle Red was living with his wife and two older children (with the youngest one to be born in 1967), and Granduncle Jim was stationed at Fort Meade. Only Granduncle Tony was there to help Great-Grandma especially after Great-Granddad committed suicide, and almost 50 years of being Great-Grandma's primary helper affected him to die at 68 years old of "chest pains" (as Dad related that Granduncle Tony started feeling to the point at which he needed to go to the hospital) and other issues.

Granduncle Tony, by the way, is, of course, not the only one who had to bear a burden alone—besides that Great-Grandma herself had to bear many burdens alone, others have had to bear burdens alone. Even myself, for another example—I've had to bear burdens alone or at least (at best) almost alone.

By the way, I wrote this primarily in regards to people (including family members) who have ditched me offline and online (and who would ditch me offline, as I can ascertain. After all, people online are reflections of themselves offline, including who they would be offline if they could get away with being so.). Now those people can surely know, if they didn't know, why I, for example, started that #unfollowforunfollow trend on Twitter: as I stated, any person who won't stick with another in his or her bad times doesn't deserve to share in his or her good times. Therefore, anyone in my own life who won't stick with me in my bad times doesn't deserve to share in any of times.

In addition, I want to thank my ditchers for showing me who you really are and not letting me find out later than I already did—and so much for the ones who (Jewish and gentile alike) claim to be fellow Christians and flout bearing others' burdens, since many of you (I suspect) also ditch others and will hear "I never knew you" when you cry out "Lord, Lord" to Yeshua (Jesus). I suppose that others will thank that ditchers for the same as well—and sadly, I can guarantee that some are thanking me for the same thing, and I need to do teshuvah for being a ditcher of those whom I have ditched.

By the way, please let me know if or remind me of when I have ditched you in bad times. I will try to be there to bear your burdens as best as I can from now on—after all, I do not want to adversely affect your life (including your health) in the way that others have affected mine or in the way that others (including, probably, I) affected Granduncle Tony's life and health.

My "PS" Status For October 28, 2013 (Cheshvan 22, 5773) at 1:37:57 AM EDT

I definitely went insane in describing how badly I need G-d to send me someone, my experience as a disabled Levite, &c.. I deservedly got a status unshared for that one, and I apologize for that. Meanwhile, to be fair, though, it does show you how serious the implications are considering that the disabled among my ancestors could not serve in the Temple (cf. Leviticus 21:17-24; and remember that Rosalia Dudayova Nagyova was a kohenet, and Johanna Hanzokova Foczkova was one if Helena Lazarova Hanzokova was one and perhaps a descendant of Ele'azar ben Aharon).

Also, consider how Avraham and Ya'akov—men who looked to the coming of the Messiah (quite technically, among the first Christians)—cheated on their non-disabled wives (Sarah and Leah, respectively. Avraham cheated on Sarah with Hagar, for example; and look who took three wives besides Le'ah instead of having the grace to annul his marriage to or divorce Le'ah when he realized that they were both tricked into taking each other instead of him being given Rachel. And none of those women were disabled—yet Abraham and Jacob cheated on them; and I'm descended from Leah's son Levi, and the Messiah made Himself to be descended from Levi and his brother Yehudah, but that doesn't make what avi Ya'akov did right.).

Do I feel encouraged, then? Not at all! I even asked another friend, when he said "I believe God will help you find that man that will be with you for the rest of your life.", "what if "the rest of [my] life" entail until he cheats on me for a younger, more-able woman and I commit suicide?"

In other words, I apologize for going insane and still hold that desperately needing prayer for G-d to send me someone isn't just smack talk with which I'm playing around—it has a lot of implications from me as a disabled Levite who's descended from at least one kohenet and can't guarantee that a Christian (including any given Messianic Jewish) man wouldn't cheat on her for even a younger, more-able woman, either.

My Facebook and Twitter Update For October 11, 2013 (Cheshvan 6, 5773) at 10:09 PM EDT

I'm just going to bed. It's obviously just not been a good day or a good week for me. As I said before, pray that I can put G-d (G-d willing) to the bachan (בחן; not the nasah [נסה]) and that G-d sends me the love of my life or someone better. I'm probably (as usual and again) the only one praying that I can put G-d to the בחן, and there I go again having to do all of the work; and I resent that I'm the one doing all the work again—G-d won't hear my prayers when few or no others are praying with and/or for me.

And some can think that I'm faking it or s***ing around, but they have no idea until they live with that which I've lived. Let me give you an idea in case you haven't been paying attention or even cared to do so:

1. Diplegic Spastia Cerebral Palsy
2. Obsessive Compulsive/Generalized Anxiety Disorder
3. Major Depressive Disorder
4. Attention Deficit Disorder
5. Irritable Bowel Syndrome
6. Being a divorce statistic without ever even having been married. Ready? My dad and both of his living siblings have all divorced and/or remarried; my mom and all but two of her living siblings have divorced and/or remarried; my Czarnecki great-grandparents had an extremely-miserable marriage; and my Green great-great-great-grandmother divorced—plus my Cassilly-Farrell great-great-great-grandparents separated at least twice. I've also been in two failed relationships—one from August 2004-May 2005, and one from February 2013-March 2013. Statistically, I am set to get divorced—and counting that men have left wives over Breast Cancer, Multiple Sclerosis, and other issues, you may gladly add in my CP, OCD/GAD, MDD, ADD, and/or IBS as all reasons why a guy wouldn't even want to date me. By the way, you may add in the CP alone. Who wants to deal with, e.g., the girl with the "casts on [her] legs", the "gimp", etc. if he certainly won't stay with a woman with breast cancer, Multiple Sclerosis, or anything else—even the common human condition known as getting old?
7. My sordid family history—please consider alone that my paternal grandmother's mother and her dad both betrayed relatives during the Holocaust. And what is my family under? A third-generation curse (counting from Great-Grandma Gaydos) or a fourth-generation curse (counting from Great-Great-Granddad Rusnak). "‘The Lord is longsuffering and abundant in mercy, forgiving iniquity and transgression; but He by no means clears the guilty, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children to the third and fourth generation.’" Not only Numbers 14:18 states this; and you may add in, e.g., Genesis 12:1-3 as well. Also please consider that I'm a bat-Anusim.
8. I am still in college and I am 23 years old.

I can add more, but I will sum up my life up for you with what eight points I've given:

I am the dirty little secret or (so to speak) elephant in the room about whom most people—even most people in my life over the course of my life—have been or are socially polite (and/or with whom they've dealt because they've felt that they've had to do so for whatever reason), who most people have hated or hate, and.or who many of most of the socially-polite and hating people wish to see dead. After all, I am the "gimp" with the "casts on [her] legs" who has more than the CP with which to deal—for example, four other conditions than the CP and being a never-married divorce statistic with two failed relationships at the age of 23.

As I have said, people don't think that I notice this s*** or want me notice what they really think of me—I am well aware of what I am and I know what people really think of me. I have also said that while things will get better if G-d is willing that they do so, He doesn't guarantee anything—He just promises what's in His will. I have furthermore said that G-d can beat what odds He's created, but He often doesn't—just, for instance, look at that I've already had two failed relationships at the age of 23 and as a descendant (not just a child, but a mulit-generational, multi-familial descendant) of divorce. Also, again, count that  CP, OCD/GAD, MDD, ADD, and/or IBS as all reasons why a guy wouldn't even want to date me,.since men have left wives over Breast Cancer, Multiple Sclerosis, and other issues.

As I have even furthermore said, I am certainly not the stupidest person or (so to speak) dullest bulb in the bunch, dullest knife in the shed, etc.. That's part of why I at least need some people to pay attention and, as I asked that more people do, pray that I can put G-d (G-d willing) to the bachan (בחן; not the nasah [נסה]) and that G-d sends me the love of my life or someone better.

But I'm not going to get a guy, let alone a good guy, right? There's the paradox: because of my CP alone—let alone my other conditions and sordid family history—I need a guy for practical purposes! Don't you get it?! That's why I need you to pray, pray, pray, and pray if you will do at least something for me—praying for me is a heck of a lot better than being socially polite about me or just dealing with (i.e., tolerating, putting up with) me, hating me, and/or wishing me dead (As I said, I notice what you really think of me; and to be more honest with you, some of you are affecting me to be driven to outright calling you morons—although I suppose that that's giving you too much credit! I should be calling the morons among you "fools"!).

By the way, I'm not Jesus (and I know that I'm not Jesus; much less Jeremiah, Job, Amos, Habakkuk, or any other person who has gone through worse pain than me); but my pain is not taken away or mitigated (at least in proportion, since G-d gives pain to each person his or her proportionality to how much he or she was created to handle if he or she could)—and what did Jesus say? "‘Assuredly, I say to you, inasmuch as you did it to one of the least of these My brethren, you did it to Me.’" and, conversely, "‘Assuredly, I say to you, inasmuch as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to Me.’ "

In conclusion, perhaps you will consider your own sakes if (and, for the fools, since) you won't consider what I need; so I'm giving you a chance to do that by quoting Jesus and reminding you that I am—believe me or not, and if I am nothing else to you or anyone else—one of the least of these. Save your own tuchuses and do something worthwhile for me—even if just for you in the end—for once instead of being socially polite toward/dealing with/tolerating me, hating me, and/or wishing me dead.

Also, as usual, ל'לילה ושבת טוב תכתבו. (although I know that have of you wish even the opposite for me). 

Another Petition Against Nehemia Gordon (To Which The Title Link Leads)

1. First of all, Nehemia Gordon violates the tenets of real Karaism. For example:


1. "Karaites consider traditional Christianity (any form of Christianity which holds that Jesus / Yehoshua has divine or semi-divine status) to be outright idol worship, in that it raises one of Elohim's creations to the level of creator, either in part or in full. Incidentally, this is precisely the view that Islam holds towards Christianity."
2. Since Karaism holds that "traditional Christianity...[is] outright idol worship", Karaites are to "not consent unto [the Christian, whether Jewish or gentile], nor hearken unto him; neither shall thine eye pity him, neither shalt thou spare, neither shalt thou conceal him;  but thou shalt surely kill him; thy hand shall be first upon him to put him to death, and afterwards the hand of all the people. And thou shalt stone him with stones, that he die; because he hath sought to draw thee away from the LORD thy God, who brought thee out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage. And all Israel shall hear, and fear, and shall do no more any such wickedness as this is in the midst of thee. " 
2. Secondly, as previous petitioners wrote, "That rabbis have good things to say about A Prayer to Our Father is a moot point. That pastors have good things to say about the book is moot as well." Nehemia is profiting off of Tanakh and violations of Deuteronomy 13:9-12. "Ye shall not make with Me--gods of silver, or gods of gold, ye shall not make unto you." (Exodus 20:19)
3. Thirdly, Nehemia is verbally abusive. Real Karaites do not verbally abuse people.

Again, Nehemia is nothing more than an abusive hypocrite and opportunist. 

Petition Against Nehemia Gordon From A Group Of Non-Messianic Karaites That Even Messianics Should Sign

 I advise everyone to sign the PetitionOnline petition against Nehemia Gordon. According to what Nehemia claims is his interpretation of Scripture, he should "shalt surely kill [a Messianic Jew like me]; thy hand shall be first upon him to put him to death, and afterwards the hand of all the people. And thou shalt stone him with stones, that he die; because he hath sought to draw thee away from the LORD thy God, who brought thee out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage. " (Deuteronomy 13:10-11, JPS)

So, Nehemia is not even being consistent towards what he claims is his own interpretation of Scripture--the Karaite one. He is instead deceitfully working in church settings, etc. to attempt to turn people away from Yeshua--thus, he's using (if you will) an Anti-Messianic equivalent of the Mohammedan taqiyya. This is not a Karaite principle in any way, shape, form, manner, circumstance, or fashion.

By the way, see "The Hebrew Yeshua vs. the Greek Jesus". Nehemia is grossly inconsistent, for example. He tells people not to use Jewish tradition that is not in the Tanakh, yet he said "Kaddish" (which is not in Scripture) when his dad died and answered "No, not according to Jewish tradition" when I asked if I could name a pet after a deceased relative.

Also, remember that Nehemia verbally abused me, and he has no problem hurting others. As the petition reads,  Nehemia "is doing more harm than good. We don't care about how your works are received by pastors, rabbis and Christians. We don't care about 'fantastic reviews.' We take no stock in them. Their comments are meaningless to us. Our eyes are on you and the effects your actions are having." Nehemia is nothing more than an abusive hypocrite and opportunist. 

Update On the Situation With Nehemia: Again, My Warning About Him Stands

I later got a very-manipulative private message from Nehemia. I will not publish the contents of that message, since the evidence here is enough. I will say that I get that hurt people hurt people (as I myself have sadly done several times), but having been hurt doesn't excuse or sanctify hurting others.

Let me also say this: someone gave Nehemia the benefit of the doubt and said that he was using the mentality of a third grader! I wish that, that were true; but that's sadly what verbal abusers want especially their victims to think. "Oh, he's just being childish, having a hard time getting his thoughts together, and unable to cope with the situation as he sees it." It's more of the act of a verbal abuser. Most kids have no clue of how abuse and hurtful certain actions can be. Adults do, and they can use those actions to try to discomfort, manipulate, and control people. Most kids are just trying to feel secure and make sense of matters. Adults, on the other hand, are trying to make others feel insecure and senseless.

I Learned The Hard Way: DO NOT TRUST NEHEMIAH GORDON ON ANYTHING!

Nehemiah is a deceiver and abuser! In fact, I had the unfortunate chance of encountering his verbal abuse. Watch how he twists my words here:

• Tonya Travis Rabbi Rashi (1040-1105 A.D.) wrote: “Behold the almah shall conceive and bare a son and shall call his name Immanuel. This means that our Creator shall be with us. And this is the sign: the one who will conceive is a girl (Naarah), who never in her lif...See More

  about an hour ago · Like
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  Nehemia Gordon Hi Tonya Travis, If you are going to quote Rashi, you should bring the whole context. Earlier in the passage Rashi comments: "The maiden (almah) - My [=Isaiah's] wife will become pregnant this year, which was the 4th year of Ahaz." The Greek says parth...See More
  

  
  

  Henry George Liddell, Robert Scott, A Greek-English Lexicon, παρθένος
  

  

  www.perseus.tufts.edu
  

  

  
  

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  46 minutes ago · Like
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  Nicole Maratovah Czarnecki I do recall Rashi being Anti Messianic myself.

  25 minutes ago · Like
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  Nehemia Gordon Nicole Maratovah Czarnecki, I requested carrying out this discussion without the usual Christian rhetoric. Calling a Jewish rabbi "anti-Christ" is extremely offensive. This was the slogan that was shouted at Jews for centuries as they were butchered in...See More

  18 minutes ago · Like
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  Nicole Maratovah Czarnecki I said Anti Messianic, not Anti Christ or Anti Messiah.

  17 minutes ago · Like
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  Nehemia Gordon Are you saying Rashi was opposed to Messianic Jews? In his day the Messianic Jews, if they existed, had far more to fear from the Roman Catholic Church they did from the rabbis. Being a Jew was bad enough. Being a Judaizing Christian was an invitation for torture.

  15 minutes ago · Like
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  Nicole Maratovah Czarnecki Yes. "Anti Messianic" is equivalent to "Anti Missionary". Remember that especially in those days, Messianic Jews were considered traitors for joining the Catholic Church, which told them to drop all and any Jewish roots and practices at the door. So (as Messianic Jews do today), they still get a hard time from both sides.

  12 minutes ago · Like
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  Nehemia Gordon That's the broadest definition of "Messianic Jew" I've ever heard. A Jew who converts to Catholicism is a "Messianic Jew"? Is that your position?

  10 minutes ago · Like
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  Nicole Maratovah Czarnecki A Messianic Jew is simply a Jewish Christian, and Catholicism was (and is still) considered Christianity. I'm pretty offended that my words were taken out of context, by the way--and you know that I've even spoken against proselytization (incuding or forcing conversion).

  9 minutes ago · Like
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  Nehemia Gordon I would like to hear from some Messianic Jews on this page if they agree that "a Messianic Jew is simply a Jewish Christian" and if a Jew who converts to Catholicism is considered a Messianic Jew.

  5 minutes ago · Like
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  Nicole Maratovah Czarnecki You heard from me.

First of all, I never said Anti Messiah or Anti Christ. Secondly, I am a Messianic Jew. Thirdly, while some Messianic Jews were and are Roman Vaticanists, many Messianic Jews recognized and recognize not Roman Vaticanist and know that Roman Vaticanism is a cult--plainly and simply! I could go on, but you get the point!

If you ever want to defend someone, don't defend Nehemia Gordon--he will twist your defense of his arguments (e.g., that Rashi was not talking about Jesus and was actually--like all really-devout P'rushiyin are--Anti Messianic and don't believe Yeshua to have been the Messiah at all!) into something that you never even said!

By the way, I think that I now know why he and his fiancee broke up--I myself wouldn't want to be married to a verbal abuser who twists my defenses of or additions to his arguments into attacks that were never made, and implies that I'm not something that I actually am, for example (Since Nehemia treated me as he treated me, I can imagine how he treated her!) ! Also, if you're in a verbally-abusive relationship--friendship or otherwise--, hightail it as soon as you realize that you are in such a relationship!

By the way, I unfriended you, unliked your page, and am no longer following you on Twitter, Nehemia! What a shame that Isaiah 29:13 applies to you, and all the proof that one needs to see that Isaiah 29:13 applies to you is to ask themselves and answer for themselves this question: Can verbal abusers really worship Yehovah? After all, for instance, "[t]hou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour." Unredeemed men abuse people; men of Yehovah don't.